Chapter 43
My mind has been running in circles since Hallis knocked on the bedroom door this morning. The space beside me was empty. Acker apparently left to retrieve the horses from the farrier before dawn, which I only came to find out when I returned our room key to the old lady at the front desk. Hallis and Beau were waiting for me nearby.
While better than the last time I saw her, Beau looks like what I assume the color gray feels like. I wonder if she can sense her own aura. If so, I wonder what it looks like, considering the massive hangover she’s probably dealing with. I ask her as much when we stop for lunch.
“Depends on how long I’m willing to stare at myself in a mirror,” she says, eyes toward a small village in the distance.
We’ve been weaving in and out of the scattering of towns neighboring the capitol. Unlike the one closer to the border, none of them have any type of surrounding barricade, but we’ve steered clear of them for reasons that have not been revealed to me despite it slowing our progress.
“Frankly, I don’t care to all that much.”
She takes a swig of water, skin pale despite the afternoon sun hanging over us. I don’t know what happened after I left her alone with Hallis. I hate that I had the best night of sleep I’ve gotten in many weeks while she was fighting unseen demons with her arch-nemesis consoling her.
“Your blaring guilt isn’t helping,” she says. I grimace.
“Should I not have left you?”
“Not that.” She makes a sucking sound with her teeth. “The other thing.”
I inhale a deep breath, turning my attention away so I don’t have to look her in the eye. I’ve been shoving the feeling of betrayal down as far as I can every time the emotion dares to make an appearance since I awoke this morning.
I’ve let my nerves run free, hoping they overshadow any other emotions threatening to break through. It’s concerning that Beau was still able to discern the sense of disloyalty plaguing me.
“I didn’t stop loving Kai when I decided to leave Alaha,” I tell her, hating the shame coating my tongue. “Even though I knew it was the right decision—the best decision—it still hurt.”
“That’s normal, having conflicting emotions about someone. It can take a long time to sort through the heartache, to separate what once was from what is meant to be.”
I shake my head. “I don’t know if he even knew what a true Match is.”
“Would it matter?”
I brave a look at her, noting the sympathy in her eyes.
“You can never get loving people wrong, Jo. There’s no shame in accepting your feelings for Kai, just like there’s also none for accepting that you have them for Acker.” She lifts her brows, expression lighter than it’s been all day. “Don’t tell Acker I said that. I like my head where it is on my shoulders.”
We’re smiling when we walk back to the horses. Acker and Hallis both pause at our return.
“Everything okay?” Acker asks with a smile, eyes flitting to Beau and back to me.
I nod. If Hallis is suspicious of Beau’s change in demeanor, he doesn’t voice it, but his eyes never leave her as she brushes by him and mounts their mare.
The nerves return as we gather our stuff and continue our journey toward the capitol. I’m back to sharing a horse with Acker. It was an unspoken understanding reached between the two of us, and Beau and Hallis seem to prefer this arrangement for the first time since leaving the border.
When I awoke to an empty bed, the Bond instantly protested at his absence. Like a strain under my ribs, the tether didn’t lessen its stinging pull until Acker was within reaching distance. Then it only reduced in intensity to a dull tug.
Still, as my body is pressed firmly between his thighs, it doesn’t feel close enough to satisfy the damned thing. Neither of us have broached the subject, but I’m dying to know if it feels the same on his end with the way he was able to halt … whatever was happening between us last night.
I can’t think about it too long, because the pulsing ache of desire comes flooding back with a vengeance. I can’t stop the memory from progressing into a full-fledged daydream where Acker doesn’t stop and we’re the reason the wall behind our bed shook all night, instead of our over-enthusiastic neighbors. Then comes the embarrassment when I recall the smug smile on his face and the shame that followed. I all but growl at my inner thoughts.
I’m trying to give Beau a break, not add to her stress with my annoying emotions.
“What is it?” Acker asks, voice low enough so Hallis and Beau can’t
hear.
“I’m nervous,” I tell him.
While that is somewhat honest, there’s no way in hell I’d admit I’ve actually been reliving last night in my mind, at nauseam.
“Anything I can do to relieve some of your stress?”
“No?” I say, confused by his offer.
“Are you sure?”
The suggestive inflection in his voice catches my attention. “What are you getting at?”
He dips his chin close, lips grazing my cheek and ear as we sway with the horse’s trot, sending shivers down my spine when he speaks. “The Bond is throbbing from your end of the tether.”
I all but gasp at the realization that he might be able to feel me through the Bond. “What are you talking about?” I say with the driest tone I can muster despite the blush coating my entire face and neck.
“You know what I’m talking about,” he says, sending another wave of chills through me.
Then he does something I least expect. He drags his mouth to the curve of my neck—the very spot he’s been fixated on—and places an open-mouth kiss to the skin. This time I do gasp, head falling back against his shoulder to give him better access. I won’t ever reveal this truth, but the fantasy I’ve been chasing all day doesn’t compare to the real heat and feel of his tongue on my skin.
I release a breath that’s somewhere between a sigh and a moan, and he places his palm against the flat of my stomach, pulling me against the hardness pressing into my lower back. He ends the kiss with a drag of his teeth over the sensitive area below my ear. I don’t need to be able to feel the end of his Bond to discern that the throbbing I feel is definitely coming
from him.
All very much him. “Feel better?”
I shake my head. “Not even a little.”
He laughs and places a chaste kiss against my temple. The gesture leaves me feeling more exposed than the kiss on my neck did, and I sit up, needing some semblance of space between us.
We ride for hours without speaking. I surmise Acker’s teasing did help.
My mind mellows out, leaving a sense of expectation rather than nerves.
Hallis and Beau are equally quiet, subdued as we pass through countryside littered with more and more homes and farms.
The roadways become congested with fellow travelers, tradesmen and farmers moving livestock. Most of the people we encounter create a wide enough berth for us to pass, seemingly wary of strangers. It’s not until we pass a family headed in the same direction as us that someone notices. The recognition is clear on the father’s face and his hurried insistence sends the rest of the family to their knees beside him. Acker places a hand on his chest in respect, but we pick up our pace not long after that.
The sun is touching the horizon as we finally circumvent one of the largest towns I’ve seen yet, when a company of men on their horses become visible at a distance. Acker holds up a hand, signalling Hallis to stop.
“Who is it?” I ask, noting the lack of flag with them.
Acker doesn’t reply right away. Hallis halts his mare next to ours, eyes squinting into the distance.
“Can you get a read, Beau?”
She shakes her head. “They’re too far away.”
Acker places the reins in my hands and dismounts. “Stay here.”
“Take Beau with you,” Hallis instructs, holding his horse still as she also dismounts.
“No,” Acker says, retrieving his strap of knives and buckling it across his chest. “I’ll give the signal when it’s safe.”
“I don’t think—”
Beau cuts Hallis off with a hand on his thigh. “Let him handle this.”
Something in Acker and Beau’s demeanor stops him from arguing, and it worries me.
Acker looks up at me. “I’ll be right back.”
We watch him march across the space between us and the men, the wind whipping through his shirt and hair with every step. I know Acker can handle himself, but there are about ten men on horseback, and it feels a
little like a fool’s errand.
“Is that…”
Hallis’s voice trails off when the line of soldiers parts, revealing a man with long blonde hair. He steps forward, and although it’s hard to make out, it’s obvious he and Acker are discussing something intensely. Unease spreads through my chest as another one of the men dismounts from his horse. I tighten my hands on the reins, urging myself to be patient.
Not until they separate and Acker turns around to return to us do I get a better look at the man he had been talking to. He begins to move toward us, Acker following close behind, and I recognize the markings on the leather shoulder of his uniform: a golden butterfly surrounded by deep burgundy.
The emblem of Maile.
I dismount as they get closer.
“Princess,” the man says upon reaching our group, sharp eyes keen on me before he folds into a bow, then a kneel, blonde hair free and cascading around his handsome face.
“Please,” I sputter, my nerves getting the best of me. “Stand.”
He smiles as he rises. “As you wish.” He does a decent job of keeping it in check to remain polite, but something tells me he finds me amusing.
“This is General Samasu,” Acker explains. “He’s a sentry from Maile.
Your mother sent him to intercept us.”
The general cocks his head, eyes the color of wheat never leaving mine.
“I’m here to take you home,” he says, leaving no room for misinterpretation.
Acker’s chin dips toward his chest, a grin forming on his face before looking up at the general, then me. “Does the princess not get a choice?”
General Samasu doesn’t so much as blink when he says, “No.”
Acker’s grin turns into a full-fledged smirk in reaction to whatever expression is on my face. He makes a motion to let me know this is my problem to handle, stepping around the general and standing close enough behind me that I can feel his body heat on my skin.
I look at Hallis, strong and steady on his horse, sword laying across his lap.
Then at Beau, who has her metal rope lassoed around a closed fist. Both prepared, not a stitch of fear or uncertainty in their gazes.
“Whose likelihood of survival are you assessing?” the general asks, inquisitive eyes on me. “Ours or theirs?”
“I don’t wish any lives to be lost today,” I answer in turn.
“I will not lie to you, princess.” He glances at the man behind me and then adjusts the strap holding the sword across his back. “Most of my men will die here if you do not come willingly, but you will come.”
“And yet you still are willing to force this?” I ask. “All the while knowing it may cost you your life?”
My question makes him smile. “Oh, no. I will not die,” he says, placing a hand to his chest. “But my men will.”
And to support his statement, he disappears. Just … vanishes from existence, leaving nothing in the place where he stood a moment ago.
Acker catches on the quickest, spinning in place to face the general where he stands behind us now. Both Hallis and Beau lose their carefully crafted semblance of calm. Hallis slides from his horse while Beau uncoils a length of her rope.
“As I was saying,” General Samasu drawls. “There’s no need to worry about me, but I appreciate the concern.”
I step around Acker’s tense back, but he stops me from moving closer with a hand around my wrist. It’s a warning not to get too close.
The general clocks it. “If you want a true pardon, you’ll hand her over to her mother without any further delay or protest.”
Acker’s body is drawn taut. I sense the tension rolling off of him, the pressure of his hand increasing around my wrist. “What makes you think I want a pardon?”
“Why else would you retrieve the princess?” the general asks, eyes locked on Acker’s.
“Well, aside from wanting to keep the promise I made to Queen Evelyn to find her daughter myself,” Acker says, sliding his hand into the palm of mine and intertwining our fingers, “Jovie is my Match.”
General Samasu freezes in place, completely unmoving other than for his golden hair dancing in the wind around him. “You’re lying.”
“He’s not,” I say, tightening my fingers around Acker’s, letting him know which side I stand on. “We are matched.”
He’s not swayed, gaze narrowed at our joined hands, assessing and calculating the likelihood that I’m being manipulated somehow. “You better find a way to convince me,” he says.
Acker and I look at each other. The only thing I can think of is the kiss we shared, where our magic wanted to meld and become one, wanted to wield our gifts together like one weapon instead of two. It was the tiniest glimpse of what we could be together. If I had concentrated on the magic aspect over the taste of him, maybe I could have sensed the possibilities of our combined powers better. But other than attacking his mouth with mine, I don’t actually know how to tap into it.
There’s a smile in Acker’s eyes as if he knows exactly where my thoughts ventured. “Give me your dagger.”
Removing it from my side, I keep my questions to myself, not wanting to let on that I’m more naive than I might seem. I’m not prepared for Acker to bring our joined hands before us, and I’m especially not prepared for him to shove the blade into the space between our palms. I can’t stop the flinch, but I don’t dare pull away despite the sudden pain.
He looks up at me through his lashes, and I get the sense this is more for my benefit than for anyone else present. “Jovinnia, Princess of Maile, is my Match. With this oath, I swear to protect her until my dying breath.”
Blood escapes through the cracks between our fingers and drips down my wrist.
There’s a shine to his eyes that I’ve never seen before. It makes my heart beat pick up in pace, my breaths deepening. I swallow past the tightness in my throat.
“And,” he says, licking his lips before continuing, “I love her.”
Hallis barks Acker’s name, a clear yet panicked warning that Acker ignores as he turns our hands to the side, letting our mixed blood splatter to the ground.
I don’t fully understand the implications of what he’s just done or why he did it, but I couldn’t fight the desire to kiss him if I tried. And, if I’m being honest with myself, I don’t try at all. I eagerly meet his descending lips with my own, my mouth open in invitation. Acker has enough wherewithal to keep it short, though he still coats my tongue with the taste of his.
A cloth smacks Acker in the side of the face, Beau’s aim hitting her intended mark perfectly. “You fool.” Her insult isn’t in jest. True anger shines behind her eyes. “Stupid, stupid fool.”
Hallis is even more upset. All he can manage is a slow shake of his head, disgust lining his face.
General Samasu, however, is damn near ecstatic. “A fool, yes, but possibly the bravest man I’ve ever met.”
“I think you mean crazed,” Hallis says.
Acker isn’t fazed by their comments. In no hurry, he takes the time to clean the rivulets of blood already drying along my fingers and palm, eyes flitting between his task and my eyes. It feels like an apology of sorts, an act of contrition. He rips the fabric of the cloth with his teeth, tearing it in two and using the cleaner shred to wrap around my bleeding palm.
He looks back at the general. “Are you convinced?” he asks, returning to business.
I, on the other hand, am a quivering mess on the inside. My stomach is in knots, head swimming. I squeeze the makeshift bandage and focus on the sting.
General Samasu shakes his head, still in a mild state of disbelief. “I suppose I am.” Then he all-out laughs. “The queen is also going to need proof.”
I motion for Acker to hand over my dagger and give it to the general.
“Tell my mother I will send word when I’m ready to come home. I’ll call for the blade in three days’ time. Will that be enough time for your return journey?”
He stares at the black stone dagger before meeting my gaze. “Dang
rabbits,” he mutters.
My heart stops at his use of words.
Shaking his head, he throws a hand up in acquiescence. “Go ahead and make it two days. Take anything more than a day to get back and she’ll have my head.”
He smiles then, and suddenly I recognize it, an affinity between him and Wren. The way his lips part, the crinkle around his nose, the shape of his teeth. I keep the revelation to myself but return the smile.
He winks at Acker. “Good luck, boy.” Then he blinks from existence.
We turn toward the men still waiting in the distance, with whom General Samasu now stands. The small battalion begins to retreat, the horses picking up pace and heading west.
Acker pinches my chin, angling my face to his, and places his mouth on mine, letting the kiss linger before releasing me from his hold. It’s simple
but feels like everything. And … It feels like the beginning of the end.
