Daggermouth (The Heart, #1) — Chapter no 4

CHAPTER FOUR

Don’t Die

The warehouse chilled to the bone after sunset, sucking warmth from exposed skin until nerves went numb. Shadera had grown accustomed to it. It made her sharp, kept her from dulling around the edges.

The cold crawled over her as she sat on the concrete floor, knees spread, ankles crossed, guns and knives meticulously laid out in front of her, while she fieldstripped the Veyra-issue 9-mil. Each click, each metallic slide, was as soothing as another’s heartbeat. She let herself vanish into the work, until the rattle of the outer fire door knifed through the quiet.

She palmed the pistol one-handed, eyes on the crosshatch of shadow in the entryway. Only two people knew the passcode to her rooftop entrance. Jaeger and Jameson Vine. And Jaeger would rather walk on broken glass than show up uninvited.

Jameson’s tread was softer than most, but Shadera still heard the whisper of worn boots on steel stairs, the way the second step always betrayed the weight of him.

He didn’t knock. Instead, he shouldered through the door, letting it slam at his back. Jameson stepped into view and stopped, his brows pulling together as he looked at Shadera on the floor. He grinned at her, canines catching in the half-light. He leaned against a steel pillar, his threadbare T-shirt stretching tight against the muscles on his scarred and tattooed arms as he crossed them over his chest.

“Shit, Shade,” he said, his voice amused, “you ever fucking sleep?”

“Sometimes,” she answered, twisting a silencer into place. “You look worse than usual.”

“You still think I’m pretty though, huh?” he teased as Shadera’s eyes rolled to the back of her head.

He came to her in three long strides, then crouched by her side, elbows on his knees. “We got a problem. Jaeger’s boys just hit a Veyra patrol down in the sixth —”

“Not my sector. Not my problem,” she cut in, finally setting the gun down, and reaching for a bottle on the floor beside her. She took a long pull. “I’m busy tonight.”

Jameson glanced down at her kill kit. “So I see.”

He let the silence hang, scanning her face for a crack in her armor, then snatched the bottle from her and gulped down a heavy swig.

Shadera quirked a brow at the gash on his forearm. “You here for something, or just to bleed on my floor?”

His hand moved to her face, slow and cautious, as if she might bite. Maybe she would. But she let him trace the line of her jaw, let him hook a thumb behind her ear and drag the elastic free from her hair. Auburn curls tumbled loose, spilling around her face.

He leaned in and Shadera didn’t pull away.

Their mouths met with the same violence as every other part of their lives— teeth knocking, lips splitting, tongues pushing past the barricades. His hands were everywhere at once. She bit his bottom lip, and it unlocked a noise in his throat, almost a groan.

The first time they’d done this, neither of them had undressed at all, just pressed into each other against an empty wall and fucked like the world was ending. Since then, the routine had gained only a fraction of tenderness on her part.

Her hands slid up the back of his neck into his silver hair, feeling the way the cropped sides bristled against her palms as the longer strands on top caught between her fingers.

“I missed you,” he breathed against her lips, but the words didn’t land anywhere.

“Don’t get clingy,” she warned, shoving him back, then rising from the floor.

Jameson grinned again as he looked up at Shadera with sharp green eyes that never settled, and rose to his full height. In the next heartbeat, he’d swept her off her feet and set her on top of her desk, hands greedy on her hips, lips pressed

into the pulse at her throat. The force of it startled the desk chair backward, made it clatter against the desk, then tip sideways. Shadera let her head fall back, eyes closed, jaw working as he bit a line up her neck to the place she always kept a razor blade tucked behind her ear.

She arched against him, feeling the hard line of his body through both their clothes. He was already hard—he was always hard for her, like a dog starved for too long and afraid it would never eat again.

She cupped the back of his skull and twisted her fingers in his hair, pulling him off her throat, then pushing him onto the bed tucked in the corner. He let her have her way with him, he always let her. Because the part of him that was as broken as she was liked it best when she played rough.

They landed on the nest of blankets, and she climbed on top of him with all the grace of a wolf mounting its prey as she dragged his shirt over his head. His own body was covered in wounds similar to hers, over his heavily tattooed flesh —stitches that never quite faded, puckered pink welts from Veyra shock batons, a ragged knife scar running from collarbone to rib cage.

In the next second, his hands were up her shirt, hot against her scars. He traced every raised edge like he was reading braille, mapping out the damage with a reverence that made her stomach knot. She grabbed his wrists and held them above his head, pinning him to the bed.

“Stop stalling,” Shadera hissed, and Jameson’s smile turned crooked.

“You always fuck me like you’re mad at me,” he said, voice muffled as she leaned forward and raked her teeth down his throat.

“I am,” she replied. “You came into my house without permission, again.”

She let his hands go, and he stripped her shirt over her head, mouth on her chest before the cloth even hit the floor. She felt his breath catch in his lungs as his fingers found an old bullet wound just under her ribs, the jagged oval where a Veyra officer had tried to end her three years ago.

“This should have killed you,” he whispered against her skin.

“They’ll have to do better than a bullet.” She pushed her hips down, ground against him.

He pulled at the buttons on her jeans, and she lifted her body just enough for him to slide them down her legs. Jameson moved to touch her face, but she

caught his hand and drove it down to her hip, guiding his grip exactly where she wanted it. He didn’t protest, instead, he looked up at her like she was the only thing in the world worth dying for.

Shadera leaned down, auburn curls falling over her shoulder, and her lips met his. Her nipples brushed against his skin, hard and dark against his chest. The room was freezing, but her body ran hot as engine coolant.

She ground herself against the rough denim still clinging to his hips, then, growing impatient, reached down and unfastened his belt with a single jerk. The button popped, and she slid his jeans down, dragging his briefs with them, leaving him fully exposed.

His cock stood up straight, thick and veined, the head glistening with proof of his need for her. Shadera wrapped her hand around it, squeezing just enough to make his eyes flutter shut. She let him see her, all of her, just for a moment, then sank down, taking him in a single unhesitating motion.

They both groaned at the contact, the sound coming out of Shadera’s mouth too close to a whimper for her liking. She rode him slow at first, her pace measured and controlled.

Jameson’s hands found her waist, then her ass, fingers digging in hard enough to bruise.

“Fuck, you feel good,” he said, letting his head drop back onto the bundled blanket. “You always feel so fucking good.”

She leaned forward, bracing her hands on either side of his head, and picked up the pace. Each roll of her hips was deliberate, calculated to draw out the exact sounds she wanted from him. His breathing went ragged, chest heaving beneath her as she worked him with the same precision she used to dismantle her guns.

“Shut up,” she breathed, but her body betrayed her, clenching around him at the praise.

She hated how he could make her respond like this, hated the way her pulse hammered when he looked at her like she was more than just a weapon.

His thumb found her clit, circling with practiced strokes.

“You like it when I tell you how perfect you are,” he murmured, voice rough with want. “You get so wet for me.”

Shadera’s rhythm faltered, a sharp intake of breath escaping her lips. She pressed her palms flat against his chest, using the leverage to ride him harder,

faster. “I said shut up.”

Jameson wouldn’t be silenced.

His free hand tangled in her hair, pulling her down until their foreheads nearly touched. “Tell me you want this,” he demanded. “Tell me you want me.”

“I want—” The words caught in her throat as he drove up into her, meeting her movement with a brutal thrust. “Fuck. I want you to stop talking.”

He laughed, the sound dark and knowing. “That’s not what your body’s saying.” His grip tightened in her hair. “You’re so tight around me, Shade. So perfect. Like you were made for this.”

Heat coiled low in her belly, building with each stroke. She could feel herself losing control, her composure cracking under the assault of sensation, and his relentless words.

“You think about this when you’re alone?” Jameson’s voice dropped to a whisper, intimate and devastating. “Think about me inside you? About me fucking you breathless?”

“No,” she lied, but her hips screamed the truth, grinding down frantically against him.

“Liar.” His thumb pressed harder against her clit, and she bit back a cry. “I think about you all the time. Think about making you come undone like this.”

The admission hit her with surprising force. She could see it in his eyes—the raw honesty, the desperate need that went deeper than flesh. It terrified her more

than any blade or bullet ever could.

“Fuck you,” she spat at him.

“You already are.” He grinned up at her, that infuriating smile that made her want to kiss and kill him at the same time. “And you’re about to come all over me, aren’t you, Shade?”

Without warning, she pulled away from him, leaving them both gasping at the sudden absence. Before he could protest, she flipped onto her hands and knees, presenting herself to him like an offering.

“Take me like this,” she commanded, glancing back over her shoulder. “And for fuck’s sake, stop being gentle.”

Jameson’s eyes darkened with something primal. He moved behind her, hands gripping her hips as he positioned himself at her entrance. “Are you sure?”

“Do it.”

He slammed into her, burying himself to the hilt in one excruciating thrust.

Shadera cried out, her fingers clawing at the blankets as he set a punishing pace.

This was what she needed—raw, mindless friction that drowned out everything else.

“That’s it,” he growled, one hand sliding up her spine to grip the back of her neck. “Take all of me.”

Each thrust drove her forward, the force of it making the bed frame creak against the wall. She pushed back against him, meeting his rhythm with hunger.

“Harder,” she gasped through clenched teeth.

The sound of flesh against flesh echoed off the concrete, punctuated by their ragged breathing and the occasional curse torn from her lips.

Jameson’s grip on her body tightened, fingers digging into the soft flesh at her hips, his other hand flexing across the base of her neck.

“This what you wanted?” he growled, his voice strained with effort and desire.

“Yes.” The admission ripped from her throat.

Her body was betraying her again, responding to his rough handling with a desperation that made her hate herself.

He leaned over her, chest pressed against her back, his mouth at her ear.

“You’re so fucking beautiful like this,” he whispered. “Taking everything I give you.”

The praise sent electricity down her spine, and she felt herself clenching around him involuntarily. She could feel the tension building, that familiar coil of heat threatening to snap.

The angle hit something devastating inside her, sending sparks of fire through her veins. She bit down on her wrist to muffle the sounds threatening to escape. But Jameson noticed—he always noticed.

“Don’t hide from me,” he commanded, his hand tangling in her hair and pulling her head back. “Moan for me, Shade.”

The heat building inside her reached breaking point at the sound of his words. Her body exploded around him, muscles contracting as waves of pleasure crashed through her. She came with a broken cry, her release coating him as her legs trembled with the force of it.

“Fuck, yes,” Jameson groaned as she spasmed around him. “That’s my girl.”

He pulled out suddenly, his hand working himself as he spilled across her back with a guttural moan. Hot liquid painted her skin as he shuddered through his climax.

They collapsed together, breathing hard in the warehouse’s frigid air. Shadera felt the wetness cooling on her back, marking her in a way that should have disgusted her, but somehow didn’t.

“Well,” she said, after a long moment of catching her breath, her voice carefully neutral again. “That was adequate.”

Jameson laughed, the sound genuine and satisfied. “Adequate? I’ll take it.”

“Hand me that rag.” She nodded toward a cloth on the floor.

Jameson retrieved it, gently cleaning her back. The tenderness in the gesture made her want to pull away, but exhaustion kept her still.

“You’re going after Greyson Serel,” he said quietly. It wasn’t a question.

She turned to face him. “Maybe.”

“That’s a suicide run, Shade. Even for you.”

“Everything’s a suicide run in this city.” She sat up, reaching for her clothes.

Jameson caught her wrist. “Promise me something.”

“No.”

He ignored her. “Promise me you’ll be careful. The city needs you alive.”

She looked down at his hand on her wrist, at the scars that matched her own.

“The city needs the Executioner dead more.”

She pulled her clothes back on, already erecting the walls she only let down for sex. Shadera could feel his eyes on her, could sense the words he wanted to say hanging in the air between them.

“Don’t,” she warned without looking at him.

“Don’t what?”

“Don’t make this more than it is.”

He was quiet for a long moment, then she heard him getting dressed behind her. When she finally turned around, he was sitting on the edge of the bed, fully clothed again, watching her.

Shadera reached for a half-smoked cigarette on the crate by the bed.

“How do you even know about this contract?” she asked, fishing a lighter from the floor. She lit the tip, taking a long drag, and exhaled the smoke into the dark.

“Jaeger told me. Thought I should know, in case…” He trailed off, running a hand down his face, then let out a bitter laugh. “You know, I might be falling in love with you and it’s fucking terrible.”

Her heart convulsed at his words, but she rolled her eyes, forcing the emotion out.

“Then you’re dumber than I thought,” she scoffed, and turned away from him, heading back to her weapons on the floor.

Jameson rose, walking to where she stood, and pulled the cigarette from her fingers. He brought it to his lips as his eyes scanned over her arsenal, then blew out a plume of smoke.

“When do you leave?” he asked, not looking at her.

Shadera swallowed, suddenly feeling a twinge of guilt that in days since getting the contract, she hadn’t told him.

“Tonight.”

The cigarette burned down between his fingers. Jameson stared at her weapons spread across the concrete like a surgeon’s tools, each one cleaned and calibrated for death. His jaw worked silently, processing what she’d just told him.

“Tonight,” he repeated, voice flat. “And you weren’t going to tell me.”

Shadera knelt down and began reassembling a gun with muscle memory.

Click, slide, snap.

The sounds filled the silence between them like small explosions. “Nothing to tell. It’s just another job.”

“Bullshit.” He dropped the cigarette, crushing it under his boot. “This isn’t some Cardinal snitch or Boundary dealer. This is the President’s son. The fucking heir to New Found Haven.”

Her fingers didn’t pause their work. The gun came together in her hands like it had been born there, every component finding its home.

“Your point?”

“My point is you’re walking into the Heart with a death wish, and calling it Friday night.” His voice cracked. “My point is I might never see you again.”

Shadera’s hands stilled.

His honesty saturated the air, raw and bleeding. She could feel the weight of his stare on her shoulders, on the intricate tattoos that wound around her arms like vines of violence. Snakes and chains, roses with thorns sharp enough to cut, names of the dead written in a line that crawled up the side of her shoulder and onto her neck.

She forced herself to look at him then, really look at him. Silver hair falling across his forehead, green eyes that held too much hope for a man who’d seen what they both had. The scar that ran from his left temple to his jaw, courtesy of a too drunk Daggermouth a few years back.

He was beautiful in the way broken things could be—sharp edges and jagged lines that caught the light wrong.

“Well, it is just another Friday night, and you knew what this was when you started fucking me. You know I don’t make attachments,” she said. “Don’t act surprised now.”

“I’m not surprised.” Jameson stepped closer, close enough that she could smell the cigarette smoke on his hands and the faint scent of gunpowder that clung to his clothes. “I’m terrified.”

The admission caught her off guard as she stared up into his eyes. Men like Jameson didn’t admit fear. They swallowed it down with cheap liquor and let it fester until it poisoned them from the inside out. But here he stood, laying his throat bare for her to cut.

She rose slowly, the gun heavy in her hand. “Fear is a smart thing to feel, it keeps you safe.”

“Then be smart, Shade. Walk away from this one.”

A laugh escaped her throat. “Walk away? You think I can just walk away from Greyson Serel?” She gestured toward the wall where his masked face stared back

at them, punctured with holes from her throwing knives. “That family destroyed everything I ever loved. My life, my—”

“Your parents,” Jameson finished quietly. “I know. But throwing your life away won’t bring them back.”

“Who says I’m throwing it away?” She moved past him toward the lockers and began pulling out gear. A tactical vest, night vision goggles and a drone scanner. “Maybe I’m finally taking it back.”

He watched her pack, each piece of equipment disappearing into her bag strategically. The weight distribution had to be perfect—too heavy and she’d never make it up the elevator shaft, too light and she’d lack the firepower to fight

her way out, if it came to that.

“What if I asked you not to go?”

The question stopped Shadera cold. Her hand froze in midair, reaching for a coil of rappelling cord.

“What if I got on my knees right now and begged you to stay?” Jameson’s voice was raw, stripped of its usual cocky edge. “Would it matter?”

Shadera’s throat tightened. She could picture it—Jameson Vine, who’d never bent the knee to anyone, dropping to the concrete floor of her warehouse. The image made her sick, made something twist painfully in her chest.

“No,” she whispered.

It wasn’t a lie.

“Look at me when you say it.”

She turned, meeting his gaze head-on, watching as his eyes raged like an autumn storm. “No, Jay. I wouldn’t stay. And it’s not because I don’t care for you, and it’s not because I have a death wish. I don’t expect you to understand, but I have to do this. I have to do this for me.”

They stood staring at each other as seconds ticked by, neither knowing what else to say. She wanted to tell him that she’d be back, that she’d make it home safe, but it was a promise she refused to make. So instead, she stayed quiet, memorizing his features until the light on her watch went red, signaling the

midnight hour.

It was time.

She felt a sudden, fierce thrill. The kind that came before a kill, before the whole world narrowed to the size of your target. She shouldered her pack, feeling the weight settle against her scars.

She strode toward him as she tightened the holster around her thigh, then took his face in both hands, scarred palms pressing into both cheeks. “You’re a good man, Jay. If all goes well, you’ll be the first to know when I’m back.”

Jameson didn’t ask for her approval, didn’t ask for permission as he pulled her against him and kissed her, hard and angry and scared. Shadera let him, let

him have that.

Maybe even let herself have it too.

She pulled away, her forehead resting on his for only a breath before pressing a palm to his chest and stepping away. A sad smile flickered across her lips, as she pushed past him toward the door.

He reached for her hand, stopping her. “Don’t die on me, Shade.”

“I’ll try, but no promises.” She squeezed his fingers, then let go.

A heavy breath seeped out between Shadera’s lips as she slipped through the door and stepped out into the Boundary.

The countdown started at midnight, and her watch silently ticked away at the seconds. She had two hours and fifty-two minutes to get into the Heart before the next patrol.

Jameson stood in the empty warehouse, surrounded by the ghost of Shadera. He looked around at the way she’d left it, and memorized every image he had of her walking inside these concrete walls over the years.

He groaned, dragging his palms down his face as he sat on the edge of the bed, and let his elbows fall to his knees. His fingers absently traced the cooling spot where she’d lain, as he let the silence settle over him.

He knew she’d be a legend someday, that her name would be the one people cheered in the streets as change rolled over New Found Haven. He’d just never imagined the possibility that she might not be there with him to witness it.

Killing Greyson Serel would incite that change, would start the ring war they were already on the precipice of.

He wondered to himself as he lay back on the bed, locking his arms behind his head, if she ever thought of him when she killed. If it was ever his face in the back of her mind in the moments when she didn’t know if she would make it

home.

He hoped she did.