Grave (Dark Kingdom, #3) — Chapter no 37

CHAPTER THIRTY-SEVEN

GRAVE

I SETTLE INTO the couch, my arms fanning the back of it, and look up at the ceiling. The room spins, and my vision goes in and out while “Sail” by AWOLNATION plays through the speakers. The words pound in my head like a drum. Two weeks I’ve gone without April, and it’s been hell. But it’s what I deserve. I was horrible to her. Just because I had a moment of weakness. I told her I didn’t need her and to leave. She fucking left. What did I expect her to do?

“Man, it’s gonna be fine,” I hear Trey say as he snorts a line of coke off the coffee table. “You were fine without her before, and you’ll be fine now.”

I block him out, close my eyes, and listen to the thunder shake the walls.

I draw in a long breath and fill my lungs with the tainted drugs. It’s not the same.

The song changes to “Bury Me Low” by 8 Graves. It’s always been my theme song.

“Grave? Man, someone is hollering at you,” he says, shoving my arm.

“Fuck ‘em.” I take another hit, needing that high I was able to reach before April entered my life. I need to drown her out. Fucking bury her so deep it’ll smother every thought of her I’ve ever had.

“Grave?” Trey sighs. “It’s Titan.”

“Fuck ‘em,” I repeat and take another hit.

Come on. Come on.

I need this hole to fill. The pain to go away. Just fucking knock my ass out.

“Grave, you sorry son of a bitch,” Titan snaps. “Open the fucking door or I will break it down.”

Maybe he’ll hit me over the head with it. Memory loss would be better than this.

How long will it take …?

I hear the door splinter and what’s left of it bangs against the interior

wall.

“Shit!” Trey hisses beside me.

Titans storms into the room, and I’m surprised he’s alone. “Where are the rest of the bitches …?” He punches me in the face so hard my head snaps back.

Blood instantly fills my mouth, and my face begins to pound.

“Fuck.” Trey jumps up from his spot on the couch next to me.

Titan grips my shirt and yanks me off my ass, then shoves me to the

floor.

“Stop, man!” Trey shouts.

I look up at my friend, already feeling my eye start to swell. “Fucking do it,” I tell him, coughing up blood that’s filled my mouth.

“Fuck, you’re a piece of shit,” Titan growls down at me.

I know I am. April knows I am. That’s why she left me. “Just put me out of my misery.”

“Get over whatever problem you have right now and move the fuck on.”

“Easy for you to say.” His woman didn’t leave him. I wonder if he didn’t share her with my brother, if she would stay with him? “I wonder who Emilee loves more?” I ask, thinking out loud.

“Grave,” he growls. “Get your ass up. We have to go.”

I close my eyes and welcome the darkness. “Fuck you, Titan.”

He yanks me up by my shirt and hauls me out of the house. Then he’s throwing me into his passenger seat. Squealing his tires, he pulls out onto the street and holds his phone up to his ear. “On our way.” Pause. “Not well.” He slides his eyes to mine. “Like shit. See you in a minute.”

“Where are we going?” I ask. Maybe it’s an intervention. I wouldn’t be surprised if they throw me into a mental hospital and toss the key away.

Everyone is tired of putting up with me. Myself included.

I blink, and my eyes grow heavy.

“How much did you have?” he grinds out.

“Not enough,” I slur.

“Fuck!” He slams his palm down on the steering wheel. “I should leave you right here on the side of the motherfucking road.”

“Do it,” I dare him.

“Nah, that’d be too easy for you. You deserve everything that is about to hit you in the fucking face.”

“Your fist? Hit me until I feel nothing.”

He just shakes his head, ignoring my question.

We enter the gate for the property the Kings and I share, and he pulls into Bones’s driveway. I groan. Pulling to a stop, he drags me out of the car and has to help me up the stairs. The moment we enter, Bones and Cross come up to us.

“This is a bad idea.” Cross sighs looking me up and down.

“Leave us,” my brother orders.

Titan lets go of me, and I fall into the wall. I blink, and then my brother is standing in front of me with his hand around my throat. “You were always

fucking weak,” he growls in my face.

“Fuck you, Bones.”

“You don’t deserve her.”

I flinch at his words. I always knew that, but that didn’t keep me from wanting her. From wanting to be better. She didn’t believe in me. Just like the rest of them.

He steps into me. “You deserve to be alone for the rest of your fucking miserable life, which might be sooner rather than later.” I know he’s trying to hurt me on purpose, and I hate that it’s working.

I go to swing at him but miss completely. He steps back, letting go of me, and I fall to my knees in his foyer. He kneels before me. “You can’t stay

high forever, Grave.”

“Watch me.”

He snorts.

“Why am I here?” I was perfectly content where I was. Getting lost in a drug-induced haze that didn’t include a gorgeous woman with purple hair and the most amazing eyes that destroyed my heart.

Instead of answering, he turns and walks away from me, leaving me lying in the entrance to his house. I enjoy the cold black marble floor against my burning skin. Closing my eyes, I fall into the darkness that I’ve been praying for as the drugs do their job.

_______________

I WAKE IN a bed that I know well. It’s one of my brother’s spare rooms. My head pounds, my jaw hurts, and I’m covered in sweat. I all but fall out of bed and stumble to the adjoining bathroom. I throw water on my busted face. I can’t open my right eye, and my lips are busted. I feel like I was fucking hit by a truck.

Opening the glass shower door, I turn the shower on and strip out of my clothes before stepping in. My legs are too weak to hold myself up, so I sit down and lean my head against the cold tile.

“You shouldn’t have brought him here.” I hear Emilee’s voice.

“Babe, he needs—”

“His ass needs to be in fucking rehab,” she snaps, interrupting Titan.

The bedroom door slams open, and they must hear me in the shower because the bathroom door flies open next. She charges toward the shower as if she’s seen me naked a hundred times. I make no move to cover myself.

We all know how much she likes dick.

“You son of a …”

“Em,” Titan snaps and pulls her back to him.

“She’s …”

“It’s not your place,” he tells her.

She breaks down in front of me like a house of cards falling to the floor.

Her body sags against his arms, and tears flow down her face. She sobs and covers her face with her hands. He spins her around, and she buries her face into his shirt.

I continue to sit on the shower floor watching her have a fucking breakdown. “And they say I need help.”

She sniffs, spins around, and narrows her eyes on me. “She will never forgive you for this,” she whispers, shaking her head. “She will never look at you and not hate you for what you did to her!” she screams.

That gets my attention. I sit up, and she turns, running out of the bathroom.

“What’s she talking about?” I demand to Titan.

“Finish up in the shower and come downstairs.”

“Titan—”

“April is here,” he interrupts me.

Hope blooms in my chest. “She wants to see me?”

He shakes his head. “She doesn’t know you’re here.”

I frown. “Why am I here?”

He runs a hand through his hair. “Because I believe in second chances.

And … I know the guy that you can be, Grave.” My heart begins to pound.

He sighs. He opens his mouth like he has more to say, but at the last minute, he decides against it. Then he turns around and walks out.

I finish up in the shower and find a Kingdom shirt and a pair of clean jeans on the bed. I pull them on and make my way downstairs. “Where is she?” I ask the moment I enter the kitchen. Everyone is accounted for except her.

No one looks up at me but Titan. He walks past me and down the hall. I follow him. He comes to a stop at a door, and he opens it quietly. My heart stops when I see April. She lies on her side, in the fetal position facing me.

Her eyes are tightly shut, and her body shakes with soft sobs.

I rush over to her. “April?” I ask hoarsely.

She doesn’t open her eyes. Instead, she begins to sob louder. Harder.

“What’s wrong?” I ask, reaching out and running my busted knuckles down her tear-streaked face.

She buries her head into the comforter as her hands grip it. I pull away from her and get into bed where I can pull her into my lap. “April …”

She sobs. I silently rock her back and forth while she breaks in my arms.

“If it’s because of me, talk to me please, baby.” Is she injured?

She starts pounding her fists into my chest, and I let her.

“Tell me you’re okay.” Maybe it’s just an emotional breakdown.

“I’ll never be okay,” she cries.

“April …”

She jumps up from my arms and out of bed. I stand to follow her but stay where I am when I see she’s just going over to her purse. She bends down, digging through it. And pulls something out. Coming back over to me, she shoves it into my chest. I grab it and look down. It’s a pregnancy test. I

swallow as I look at it.

She’s pregnant.

I got her pregnant. Then I failed her. I showed her that I’m nothing. Just like her father. I can’t be there for her. Not the way she needs. Now I’m going to be a father. “I … I’m sorry.” I swallow the lump in my throat.

Looking back up at her, I take her hand in mine.

I believe in second chances, Titan had said. He knew. She will never forgive you … so does Emilee. They all do. I’m the last one to find out.

Tears run down her face, and I lick my lips. “I can do better. I will be

better. For you … for the baby …”

Her bottom lip begins to tremble.

“I know I can. I love you, April.” She closes her eyes. “I …”

“I can’t trust you,” she whispers softly.

My heart breaks at her words. “April …” I try to tell her that she can, but my throat closes. My chest tightens. She’s right. She can’t.

“I’m gonna have this baby, Grave. But I won’t raise him or her in a world where their father is always high.”

She pulls away from me, and I allow it. I stand in the middle of my brother’s spare bedroom while she crawls back into the bed and cries. I remain silent, unable to move. Barely able to breathe at the tightness in my

chest.

She’s right.

And it hurts like fucking hell. Minutes, maybe hours pass by before her cries stop, and her breathing evens out. She’s fallen asleep, and I’ve just stood here. Numb. Without turning to look back at her, I finally get my heavy feet to move. I walk out the front door of my brother’s house without bothering to say a word to anyone.

And Emilee’s words finally make sense. She will never look at you and not hate you for what you did to her! She was also right. April will never forgive me, and I’ll never forgive myself.