Chapter Twenty
“We need to load this all into the compost bins before lunch. You almost
done in there?” Ronan calls from outside.
I lean over the work-bench and stretch onto my tiptoes to hang the
shears onto the hook, admiring the tool shed. Everything is new and clean
and well-labeled, and the scent of cedar wafts through. It’s so different from
the drafty old barn where my dad stores our farm equipment.
“Come on. Hurry up!” Ronan’s hungry. I can tell. That’s the only time
I’ve ever seen him grouchy.
“Hold on!” I holler back, annoyed, shifting a box that’s hindering my
reach.
Suddenly, something leaps out of it, grazing my neck on its way past.
With a loud shriek, I drop the shears and jump back, just in time to
see a brown and black striped body disappear behind some bags of mulch in
the corner.
Ronan comes barreling in, his face stricken with panic. His strong
arms instantly rope around me and he pulls me into his chest protectively.
“What happened?”
“A chipmunk.”
“A chipmunk?” The tension releases in his arms. “Are you kidding
me? Jesus Christ, I thought you were being mauled by a bear or
something.”
“A bear, just sitting inside a garden shed?”
“Well, the way you screamed!” He defends himself.
“It touched me!”
“It touched you.” He heaves a sigh, and then chuckles. “Fucking
lucky chipmunk.”
“Shut up.” I’m laughing now too. Of course he’s turned this into
something sexual.
I’m still in his arms. He peers down at me thoughtfully, but says
nothing.
“What?”
His eyes sparkle as they drift over my mouth, and farther down, to
where my chest presses against his. “You should give me a chance.”
“A chance? For what?”
The heated gaze that lifts to meet my eyes answers me immediately.
“I can’t.”
“Why not? I’ve seen you looking at me. I know you want me.”
My cheeks begin to burn. “No, I don’t.” I do look at him a lot. And
Connor. It’s hard not to—they’re both lean and cut and gorgeous. “And that
doesn’t mean I’m going to sleep with you.”
His smile falls off as his hands begin to wander, sliding up to settle on
my shoulders, his thumbs grazing along the collar of my t-shirt at my
collarbone, just touching my skin enough to send a thrill down to my
breasts. “I’m serious.”
“So am I.” I sigh. “I don’t want to mess things up by complicating
them.”
“It won’t. We both know where we’re coming from.” He says it so
matter-of-factly.
I’m already shaking my head. “I can’t.”
“Yeah, you can. I’m telling you that you can.” He pushes a wayward
strand of hair off my forehead. “As unbearable as it will be for me, I’m
giving you permission to use my dick for your amusement.”
“Oh my God. Stop it!” I laugh as I push against his chest, my palms
reveling in his firm muscles. He has never so overtly propositioned me
before. Is it because of what happened last night with Connor? Is he jealous
and getting competitive?
I gain some space between us, only to lose it when Ronan steps
forward. “Does it make you uncomfortable to know that I’m hard for you
right now?”
I can’t keep my wide eyes from dropping down to his pants. Sure
enough, I can see the outline of his erection. Does it make me
uncomfortable? No, I don’t think so. But I don’t tell him that.
He smiles and under his breath, I hear a soft mutter of, “God, you’re
beautiful.”
A nervous laugh escapes me. “Come on! You’ve slept with my
roommates!”
“And you fucked Aspen. So what?”
“He wasn’t your roommate. And I watched you with Rachel.”
He rolls his eyes. “Once, like, forever ago.”
“That’s not the point!”
He steps in closer and I don’t back away this time, even though I
know I should, my entire body suddenly alive with adrenaline, reacting to
the potential pleasure that Ronan is offering, even while the voice inside my
head is screaming, no! no! no!
“The point is that you just stood in a shower for twenty minutes by
yourself last night, listening to your roommate bang some guy. Don’t tell
me that didn’t turn you on.”
I groan. “I’m really regretting telling you about that.” The only reason
I brought it up was because I felt like Connor should know. He didn’t seem
to care much, but they were both very interested in the fact that I stayed to
listen to the act in its entirety. And whether I touched myself.
I sure as hell didn’t answer that question honestly.
“Do you want me to watch Connor fuck you? Would we be even
then?”
Maybe this isn’t about competition or jealousy, after all.
But... oh my God. “Do you really want to watch me have sex with
Connor?” Just the thought has me blushing furiously.
“What, like you’ve never thought about it?”
Just last night, actually. “Thought about you watching me have sex
with Connor? Uh... no!”
“Would you do it if Ronan isn’t watching?” Connor pokes his head in,
sliding his aviators down over the bridge of his nose to eye us. He’s
obviously been listening. “What the hell are you two doing in here?”
My cheeks burn even brighter. “Sorry, I was attacked by a
chipmunk.”
“Oh, come on. You know Ronan’s dick is bigger than a chipmunk. A
squirrel, maybe.”
The two of them burst out in laughter and I just shake my head at
them.
Connor steps into the shed. “So where’d this killer chipmunk go?”
I point to the corner, and he wanders over to kick the bag of mulch
with his work boots. “We have to get the little bastard out. Can’t have them
nesting in here.”
I watch as they begin dragging out the various boxes and bags tucked
in beneath the table, the muscles in their arms and backs straining, the crew
work pants stretching over hard asses.
“Fuck! There it is!” Connor shouts, and a second later a furry little
body scurries past us and out the front door, earning my shudder.
“Hopefully he’s smart enough not to come back.” Connor dusts his
hands off as Ronan shoves a barrel back under the desk. “So, back to the
topic of us together. Is Ronan just watching? Or do I have to share you? At
least let me have first dibs. I’m so brokenhearted over Tillie.” He
emphasizes that with a fake pout.
I spin on my heels and bolt out the door to climb behind the wheel of
the flatbed truck. I crank the engine in an attempt to drown out their
laughter. It seems I’ve somehow given them the green light. The innuendos
are gone. Now it’s straight proposition.
Connor rounds the truck, resting his arms against the door in the open
window, amusement splashed across his face. “What? You think you’re
gonna drive?”
“I never get to drive.”
“This isn’t a Honda Civic, Abbs. Do you even—”
I throw it into first gear and release the clutch. Connor jumps back
just as the truck lurches forward. I take off down the road, leaving them in a
cloud of diesel fumes.
The composting site is a quarter mile up the road.
That should give all of us time to cool off.
~ ~ ~
Lorraine’s hand flies through the air, making contact with Tillie’s cheek.
The slap echoes through the staff lounge with an audience of at least
twenty-five, most of us standing around the fireplace to watch the catfight
unfold.
Connor tsks. “That’s not good. She could get canned for that one.”
Nudging me with a soft elbow, he whispers, “Did you squeal, little piglet?”
“No! I haven’t said a word to anyone but you two!” I’m actually
offended that he’d even suggest it.
“Security cameras would have caught him going in,” Ronan murmurs,
downing his beer. “I swear, Corbin has a pussy the way he gossips.”
Tillie has the nerve to look appalled at Lorraine’s tear-filled violent
reaction to finding out that her roommate slept with her boyfriend, while
James has the decency to appear at least a little sheepish from his table.
Thanks to the three beers and one shot I’ve already downed, I feel the
sudden urge to walk over there and slap him for his cheating part in all this.
“Come on.” Ronan grabs my arm and pulls me toward the exit.
I’m not at all surprised that he wouldn’t be interested in watching the
emotional fallout. I don’t want to watch it either, so I happily follow him.
Not until we reach the side door do I realize that Connor’s in tow as well.
“What? I want nothing to do with that either,” he murmurs.
The three of us head down to the staff dock, our quiet gazes on the
sun as it hangs in the sky, just beginning to set. “I don’t think I’ll ever get
used to these long summer days.”
“I hear the winters here are even longer. Six hours of daylight, or
something like that.” Ronan pulls out a cigarette.
Ronan and I sit out here almost every night after dinner, so much that
I’m used to his bad habit. I’m pretty sure that when my summer in Alaska is
over and I want to transport myself back to these peaceful nights out on the
dock, all I’ll need to do is light a Camel and close my eyes.
A full can of beer appears in front of me. Connor pulls two more from
his pocket. He must have poached them from the crew’s table on his way
out.
“I shouldn’t.” I say this even as I sit down and crack the top. I’m
much too relaxed for my own good. This one might put me over the edge.
“That a girl.” Connor throws an arm around my neck and pulls me
backward against his chest, his legs stretched out on either side of me.
“Why can’t every chick be as cool as you?”
“I’m a cool chick?” I roll my eyes but smile, torn between elbowing
him in the stomach so I can pull away, and staying exactly where I am. I
end up staying put, sipping my beer and looking out over the water as I lean
against his chest. “You know, this isn’t as bad as I thought.”
“What. The beer?”
Ronan chuckles. “Connor’s hard dick pressed against your back?”
I stretch my leg to give him a playful kick. He’s quick, grabbing me
by the foot and pulling my leg to dangle over his lap.
“What’s not as bad as you thought?” Connor nuzzles his face against
my neck.
Again, I know I should stop this right now. But I close my eyes
instead. “No. Alaska.”
“Fuck. Alaska’s awesome! Why would you ever have thought it
wouldn’t be?”
“I don’t know. I just did,” I murmur, catching Ronan’s thoughtful
gaze. He slides his hand over my calf with affection, but says nothing.
He understands exactly why.
But that’s our secret.
~ ~ ~
“Abbi!”
“Abbieeeeeeee!”
“Oh my God, would you shut your two fuck boys up! Some of us
have to be up soon,” Tillie snaps from behind her curtain.
It’s three in the morning, and Ronan and Connor have been standing
outside our cabin for the past five minutes, calling my name. Someone’s
going to alert security soon if they don’t shut up.
“They’re not my fuck boys.”
“You sure about that? Because they sure seem to love you.” Bitterness
seeps through her voice.
“At least she waited to get with her roommates’ boyfriend, whore!”
comes the equally vicious retort from the top bunk.
I’m honestly not sure how we’re going to get through until the end of
August without them killing each other.
I ignore them both, sliding my shower flip-flops and a jacket on
before I step out into the cold.
“Abbi!”
Their shouts aren’t coming from the path. They’re coming from
behind our cabin. I wander over, a little panicked that something’s wrong.
Ronan and Connor stand with their backs against the wall, just under the
window.
“What the hell are you two doing out here?” I hiss.
“There she is!” Connor reaches out to pull me into his chest with no
effort. “We missed you.”
“I was with you a few hours ago.” I’m hit with the smell of beer.
“God, you two are really drunk!”
“Nah. Well, maybe just a little bit.” I can’t see Ronan’s face in the
dark, but I can hear the sly smile in his voice. “But we had to see our girl.”
I roll my eyes, but I laugh. “You two are idiots.”
Connor squeezes me tight. “Endearing idiots, though.”
“Endearing. Dude. That’s a big word.”
Connor lets go of me to punch Ronan in the chest.
“Go to bed, you two. We have to start work in a few hours.”
“You’re right. Okay. Let’s let our girl sleep.” But Connor doesn’t
release me right away, instead pulling me flush against his firm body. He
dips his head into the crook of my neck like he did on the dock earlier, his
mouth against my ear. “Good night, sweet girl.” It’s not a kiss but it may as
well be, the shivers his lips send down my spine, making my nipples tighter
than they already were from the cold.
Releasing me, he strolls away with ease, staggering only slightly.
Ronan scoops me into his arms and settles a hand on the back of my
head, weaving his fingers through my hair. He gently tugs until my head
falls back.
I know he’s staring down at me, searching the dark for my eyes. Even
though we can’t actually see each other, I can feel that haunting gaze on me,
boring into me. It’s intense.
A soft gasp slips from my lips as he grows hard against my stomach.
“Why did you two come here tonight?”
He leans forward and smacks his forehead into mine.
“Ow!”
“Sorry.” He adjusts until our foreheads simply lean against each other.
“Well, I can’t speak for Connor but I wanted a fresh memory of you so I can
take it back and jerk off in my bed.”
I should be shocked that he admitted to that, but I’m not. I should be
utterly disgusted by that prospect. But instead I find myself giggling, and
warmth blooming in my core.
“God, it’s becoming impossible to resist you, red,” he whispers,
leaning down to place the softest kiss on my jaw.
I shouldn’t let him do this.
I shouldn’t let either of them get away with anything they’ve been
doing lately.
And yet I don’t pull away, reveling in the closeness, in the smell of
him, in the heat from his body, in the knowledge that he wants me.
His lips find my ear. “Now, go be a good girl and touch yourself,
thinking about us.” Peeling away from me, he heaves a sigh and wanders
away.
Us. He said us. Not simply him.
I duck back into the cabin and crawl into bed as quietly as possible. I
count the slow, heavy breathing of five people. The cabin’s full tonight, but
at least they’re all asleep again.
And I’m wide awake.
And smiling at the bunk above me, thinking about those two.
I’m sure Connor is already facedown and snoring by now. But Ronan,
I’m not so sure. Could he actually be lying in bed, rubbing himself, thinking
of me? I close my eyes and try to picture what that would be like. I have a
pretty good idea, given I’ve already seen him naked and in the throes of
passion.
Heat stirs between my legs. I haven’t come since the night with
Michael.
My phone, on silent, lights up on the shelf beside me with an
incoming text.
Oh my God.
My cheeks flush as I take in the picture of Ronan, lying in bed, naked
and smiling up at the camera. It cuts off at his pelvic bone where the tuft off
dark hair begins, but the way his arm is stretching down leaves little to the
imagination of what he’s doing.
He really is beautiful.
And he really is jerking off right now.
I should have known. Ronan’s not one to exaggerate or outright lie.
A second later, a second text comes in:
Where’s yours?
I stifle my laugh, afraid of waking others up.
Not a chance.
Come on...
There’s no way in hell I’m sending a picture like that to him, or
anyone, ever.
Good night.
At least let me see your face.
Chewing my bottom lip with indecision for all of three seconds, I
quickly hold my phone up in front of me and snap a picture of just my face.
Deciding it’s flattering enough, I send it.
Now leave me alone.
Perfect. Thank you.
You realize what he’s doing with that picture, Abbi. Right?
Another wave of heat flushes between my legs. I flip to his picture
again, admiring his chiseled body—it rivals Connor’s, in my opinion—and
his handsome face. And his candor. There’s no confusion or head games
with him.
Another text comes through:
Did that pic offend you?
I frown at his question. Now he’s worried about offending me?
No.
Good.
Another picture follows ten seconds later.
I gasp at the hard dick that fills my phone screen, gripped in his palm
and smeared in cum.
All for you, babe. Night.
Oh my God. I cover my mouth with my hand as I stare at it in shock,
my heartbeat pounding in my throat. He really wasn’t kidding.
And it’s turning me on.
I shut my phone off and set it on the ledge, wondering if I should
keep the image or delete it.
An hour later, still lying in bed with an uncomfortable buildup
between my thighs, I reach for my phone to study the two pictures. Settling
on the one with Ronan’s face, I slide my hand into my pajama bottoms.
