Chapter Thirty-One
I push myself up off the ground, my knees bloody with carpet burn. “Excuse me?”
She steps down from her throne and crosses the carpeted floor to wrap me in an awkward hug. It’s like she’s never hugged anyone before. It’s too tight.
Too sharp. She smells of lilies that wilted days ago.
She pulls back, both hands on my shoulders, and sighs. “Don’t tell Bram, but I always wanted a daughter.”
“Forgive me, Your Majesty, I’m confused.”
“Bram is going to be thrilled. You always were his favorite.”
My heartbeat kicks up, and the floor tips under me. “But I lost.”
She shakes her head. “It was my final little taste of fun. You passed with flying colors. You should have seen the others. Olive begged. Emmy just stood there. Faith tried to cry but could barely squeeze out a tear. Marion laughed, which I found most unsettling. What an odd girl she turned out to be.” She pauses. “But you. You were the picture of dignity. Exactly what a princess should be.”
I stand, stock-still, like I’m floating somewhere out of my body. She’s speaking so quickly I can barely keep up.
“Bram will propose tonight at the Kendalls’ ball. You two will be the talk of the town. We’ll have the wedding here, of course, on the solstice. You have a sister, right? We can arrange for her to be a lady-in-waiting if you wish, but I will choose the rest.”
“I’m—I won?” I still can’t wrap my head around what it is she’s saying.
“Keep up, please.”
I think of the very first night of the season, when Emmett pulled me into that room at the ball and said If you let me help you, Ivy Benton, you could be queen.
“There’s only one matter left to settle,” she says. “The matter of your
bargain.”
“I didn’t make a bargain, ma’am.”
She tuts her tongue. “That’s exactly the problem. I’ve lived a long time, and I try to learn from my mistakes. I married my most recent husband without him having made a bargain. He used that bargain for the benefit of another woman’s child and has resented me every day for the rest of our marriage for it. I can’t have that happening to Bram. You must make a bargain, and then we can proceed.” She looks over me carefully and cocks her head. “I could tame your hair? Make you a croquet prodigy? We can just do something small, get it off the table.”urn. “Excuse “Oh—” I sputter.
A storm cloud passes over her face, and she levels me at once with a glareor to wrap me so venomous it’s as if the light in the room dims.It’s too tight.
“Unless you want something else?” Her tone is sickly sweet, like rotted
fruit.n’t tell Bram, “I’m not sure what you mean.”
“I will ask you this just once, Lady Ivy, then we put the matter to bed
forever.”
“All right.” My voice shakes.
“Would you rather have Prince Emmett De Vere?”u passed with I freeze, my blood sluicing in my veins. “I’m sorry?”. Emmy just “I’m not ignorant of what happens within the walls of my palace. I’vetear. Marion noticed an . . . affection between the two of you. Would you rather have him?turned out to Bram deserves a wife who is devoted to him completely. My son has a bigxactly what a heart. It won’t do to have it smashed by the people he loves most.”
There’s a knock at the side door closest to the throne. Queen Mor and Ibody. She’s both pause. Prince Consort Edgar is leaning against the doorframe. He’s got a pair of wire spectacles on his nose and a book in his hand. “Just wanted to letill be the talk you know breakfast has been served, darling. I didn’t mean to interrupt.” Is itsolstice. You a coincidence that he’s back?aiting if you “I’ll be along shortly,” she answers, and I watch Emmett’s father walk back through the door and know immediately what I have to do.
“No,” I say decisively. I excise my mind from my body. I float somewhere up on the muraled ceiling so I don’t feel the cracks in my heart soulled me into intense it’s like my ribs are breaking.you could be “Emmett and I are merely friends. He was only helping me get to know Bram.”atter of your The queen looks me up and down. I’m not sure she believes me.
“As for the matter of the bargain,” I continue. “I need time to consider.
a long time,May I have an hour?” cent husband“I suppose tea is ready, and this would give me time to drink it.” She he benefit ofnods. “See you in an hour, Lady Ivy.” e rest of ourI read in a book once that if sharks stop moving, they die. I feel like that must make anow, like if I stop walking and consider what I’ve just done, my heart will ly and cockscease to beat.
We can justI walk down the stairs, out the door, and into the same carriage that brought me here. “Savile Row,” I direct the driver.
The footman helps me down from the carriage, his face still bloody from e with a glaremy scratch, but he betrays no emotion. I instruct the driver to wait. “I won’t be long.” et, like rottedThe tailor’s sharp scissors glide through a row of gray tweed. The shop smells of sewing machine oil and warm wool. He pauses as I walk in. “Lady Ivy, a pleasure. Your order is ready. Would you like to examine it, or should I
matter to bedwrap it up?”
“Wrap it up, please. Thank you.”
I’m grateful I had the foresight to commission the coat weeks ago, back on a lazy day between Viscountess Bolingbroke’s lessons. At the time, I’d pictured delivering it to Emmett as a joke, something to commemorate the palace. I’veend of the season. er have him?Package in hand, I hop back into the carriage and race back to the palace. son has a bigAn hour isn’t long, and I have so much I need to say.
Caledonia Cottage feels like a haunted house without the six of us in it. I en Mor and Iwalk into the sitting room and can see us, like ghosts, sitting around the fire. me. He’s got aBut I am alone now, and I have to be strong. wanted to letThere’s a fountain pen and parchment on a small writing desk by the terrupt.” Is itwindow. I sit down in the hard wooden chair, dip the metal nib into the dark ink, and drag it across the page. s father walkI can’t make anything better. I only hope I can make him understand.
Tears stream down my face and neck and into the collar of my dress as I ody. I floatwrite, but I don’t stop to brush them away. I don’t have time. n my heart soWhen I am done, I fold the letter and slip it under the ribbon of the box from the tailor. get to knowWith only minutes left to spare, I race back across the main palace, shove the box at a footman, and ask that it be delivered to Emmett. I’m running, a clumsy escape on heavy feet. But it will be a bloodless goodbye. e to consider.There was never going to be another end to our story. I can see that now.
I burst back into the throne room, hunched over, my hands on my knees, Shegasping.
“Well,” the queen asks. “What have you decided?” feel like thatI brush a sweaty lock of hair off my forehead and take the deepest breath my heart willI can muster. “I want you to make me forget Prince Emmett.”
carriage that
bloody from wait. “I won’t
ed. The shop
alk in. “Lady it, or should I
eks ago, back
the time, I’d memorate the
to the palace.
x of us in it. I
desk by the into the dark
my dress as I
on of the box
palace, shove m running, a
I burst back into the throne room, hunched over, my hands on my knees, gasping.
“Well,” the queen asks. “What have you decided?”
I brush a sweaty lock of hair off my forehead and take the deepest breath I can muster. “I want you to make me forget Prince Emmett.”
