CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
Early the next week, when Angelika went to take the GED exam, Esme went, too. She didn’t need a GED and had no one to impress, and a high school diploma wasn’t going to help with her work. But the cost hadn’t been horrible, and she’d done all this studying. She told herself she did it to set an example for Jade.
But deep inside, she knew she did it for herself, too.
Unconsciously, she’d been studying for it this entire time.
Usually, she couldn’t do things because the opportunity wasn’t there, and the worry persisted that maybe she couldn’t because she just wasn’t good enough. Maybe all rich people were rich because they deserved it. Maybe she was poor because she, too, deserved it. But now the opportunity was right here, and she wanted to see.
What happened when you gave someone an opportunity?
Later that week, she still hadn’t figured out how to solve her visa problem, and the determined fire in her heart had banked. When she got her transcript in her email inbox, she opened it with resignation.
The contents put goose bumps on her head. She checked the name three times to make sure they hadn’t made a mistake and sent it to the wrong person, but no, the name was unmistakably Esmeralda Tran.
Under every category, it read: PASS GED College Ready + Credit. She’d achieved perfect scores across the board.
Did this mean she was smart?
It did. The proof was right here on her phone. Her heart burst with pride— in herself, for a change. Well, she wasn’t very smart. Just a little smart. Most
people graduated from high school here. But that was more than she’d ever dared to dream of. This country girl had a high school diploma.
This was important. This meant something big. But her mind was too busy with this explosive happiness to grasp it all.
Her phone buzzed a few times, and when she looked at the screen, she saw she’d received text messages from Angelika.
I passed!
We’re celebrating at the boba shop by school.
Come!!!!!!!
Why not? She wanted to share her news, but it was the wrong time to call home, and talking to Khải was out.
She punched in a quick response, checked her spelling twice, and sent it.
Congratulations! See you there. :) After she finished closing down the restaurant, she untied her apron from her waist, put it away, and waved good-bye to Cô Nga. It took three minutes to cross the street and walk to the bubble-tea shop, and when she stepped inside, the humidity wrapped around her like a blanket. Small flat-screen TVs were mounted on the walls by different groupings of tables. One played a Taiwanese drama. One played a football game. The one by the small group of Esme’s classmates played a golf game.
Esme waved at everyone, ordered and paid for a plain black tea with milk and pearls, and helped herself to the seat next to Angelika. The space across from her was taken by Miss Q, who was wearing jeans, a relaxed button- down shirt, and, of course, a scarf. Stylish as ever.
“I knew you would pass,” Miss Q said with a wide smile.
“Of course she passed.” Angelika flipped her hand like it was a foregone
conclusion, and Esme grinned.
“I passed, thank you. Congratulations to you, too. Congratulations to everyone.”
The other seats at the table were occupied by three male classmates, Juan, Javier, and John, and they congratulated her back before they got up.
“We have to go, but glad to see you,” Juan said. “Time for college now, eh?”
She blinked in shock. The idea had never occurred to her. “Maybe.” She grinned in unexpected excitement before reality caught up with her, and the smile drooped off her lips as she waved at the men. “Bye.”
“Why the look?” Miss Q asked once the guys had left the shop.
“I can’t go to college.”
“Why?” Miss Q and Angelika asked at the same time.
Esme flinched. “Because I have to go back to Việt Nam on August ninth.”
And there was no way she could afford to go to school back home. They needed her income too much, and that didn’t factor in the bribes she’d need to pay to move her paperwork and get accepted anywhere good.
“What kind of visa do you have?” Miss Q asked.
Esme looked down at her ugly fingers on the table. “Tourist visa.”
“Me, too.” Angelika covered Esme’s hand with her own and squeezed.
Something sparkly caught Esme’s attention, but Angelika pulled her hand out of sight before Esme could take a closer look.
“There are other kinds of visas, you know,” Miss Q pointed out. “If you get accepted by a college or university here, they’ll grant you a student visa.
They’ll even let you bring your family here for the duration. After you get a degree, you could try for a work visa.”
The air punched out of Esme’s lungs. “Could I get accepted to a college or university here?”
Her GED scores flashed in her mind’s eye. PASS GED College Ready +
Credit.
“Of course you could. Were your scores good?” Miss Q asked.
She nodded, trying to keep the smile off her face and failing, and showed Miss Q her transcript on her phone. “Thank you for teaching me.” She’d earned each of those scores by herself. They were hers.
And maybe they were the key to belonging here.
Miss Q grinned and kept on grinning and her eyes sparkled with unshed tears. “The pleasure is mine.”
Excitement bubbled in Esme’s blood like champagne right after they popped the cork. If what Miss Q was saying was true, she actually could become a real accountant. Or maybe something else. She could be anything.
She could be sophisticated and educated someday and hold her chin up— even in front of Khải.
Except there was one problem. “How much is college?” she asked hesitantly.
“It depends on the school. Anywhere from ten thousand dollars a year to fifty thousand for undergraduates, but there are loan programs and scholarships,” Miss Q said.
Tension stole through Esme’s muscles. Ten thousand American dollars was more than she’d made in her whole lifetime. If a job here wasn’t guaranteed, she didn’t know if she dared to take out a loan like that once, let alone four times. But if she could keep working at Cô Nga’s, she could probably manage. It would be tight, but that wouldn’t be anything new.
She was mentally doing the math, figuring out how many shifts she could take and subtracting the costs of rent, food, and tuition, when Miss Q added, “In your case, you’d have to get a scholarship because you’re not allowed to work on a student visa, but I know schools nearby that offer them, even to international students. With your GED scores and personal experience, you have a chance, Esme. I’m going to contact the people I know and see if they’ll consider you as a special case.”
Esme’s lips moved without making sound. She understood the individual meanings of the words spoken, but she was in too much shock to interpret their overall message. She knew about failure and struggling to earn her way.
Generosity of this magnitude didn’t make sense to her.
“Keep your eyes open for my email, okay? It could come any day. If I send you an application, fill it out and send it to me right away. I’m going to go call my friends now. Good-bye, you two.” Miss Q charged out of the boba shop like she was on a mission, going so fast Esme didn’t even have time to thank her.
Could Miss Q really help Esme get a scholarship? That would be … amazing. And everything. It was, she realized, her very last option.
Experience told her to check her enthusiasm, but Miss Q believed in her, and she really had passed the GED with perfect scores. If she could do that, just think of all the other things she could do if she had the chance. This was real. This might actually happen. And her hope grew out of control.
Originally, she’d envisioned herself marrying Khải and continuing life as a waitress. That was great, wasn’t it? She’d give Jade a wonderful future that way, and she’d be with Khải. Maybe they’d make more babies.
But now, a new dream formed in her heart, one she’d never dared to encourage but wanted with breathless intensity: doing something she was passionate about, changing this world for the better, being more. She didn’t even know what she was good at, but if she could explore and learn … One of the workers at the shop handed Esme her milk tea, and she thanked him and drew the sweetened tea and chewy pearls into her mouth through the large straw. The TV flashed to a close-up of a golf player, and the DMSoft logo on his hat looked familiar.
After a second, she remembered that was where Khải worked. On the top floor, in a closet. It had to be a big company if they sponsored golf tournaments. Good for Khải. Maybe if he worked hard, they’d promote him, and someday he could redo his yard.
“What happened to your boyfriend?” Angelika asked, breaking the silence.
Esme’s hands tightened around her milk tea. “No more boyfriend. Not ever boyfriend.” They’d just been … housemates who slept together.
Now that she was gone, she hoped he was climbing the walls with sexual frustration. She hoped he thought of her when he pleasured himself. Because he’d be doing a lot of that from now on.
Unless he met someone new.
Her hackles rose as she imagined Khải with another woman, kissing her the way Esme liked, caressing her the way Esme needed, letting her touch him the way only Esme ever had. Would he trust another woman with his body now that Esme had “initiated” him? She supposed she should feel proud if that was the case, but it just made her want to claw this imaginary woman’s face like an angry jungle cat.
She shook her head to clear it of the violent thoughts, and found Angelika watching her with sad understanding.
“He was a good catch,” Angelika said. “My fiancé, he is sixty. And gone all the time for business.” She looked down at her dazzling engagement ring.
That was what Esme had noticed earlier. Angelika had gotten engaged without saying anything. “His children hate me. They are older than I am.”
“In time, they will see,” Esme said.
Angelika looked down at her left hand, fisted it, and dropped it below the table. “I do not think so. They keep telling me to go back to Russia, and they are convincing him to get the vasectomy—you know, so he cannot have more babies? I am afraid this will end in divorce. Or not happen at all.”
“Why do they—”
“To protect the money when he dies,” Angelika said bitterly. “I agreed to sign a contract before the wedding, so if we divorce, I do not get anything.
But that is not enough for them. I always wanted a family.”
“Does he … love you?” Esme asked.
A soft smile spread over Angelika’s lips. “Yeah, he does. And I love him.”
Esme squeezed her friend’s arm. “Then you two will be fine.” Unlike Esme and Khải.
Angelika smiled before her expression went thoughtful. “A scholarship sounds good, but have you thought of dating other people?”
Esme shook her head.
Angelika sent her an impatient look. “It is just dating, Esmeralda.”
“Dating has kissing and touching and …” She couldn’t bring herself to say sex. The thought of being with another man so soon made her skin crawl. A different woman would be out romancing every desperate man she could find —she had Jade to think about, after all—but Esme couldn’t make herself do it. She was probably naïve for thinking this way, but if she married, it had to be a real marriage. She didn’t have the heart to take advantage of anyone or hurt them. That meant she had to fall out of love first. “I am not ready.”
Angelika’s lips thinned, but she eventually nodded. “I hope you get that scholarship. I don’t want you to leave. You are my only friend here.”
Esme told herself to prepare for disappointment. But her heart wouldn’t listen. She had this dream now, and she’d never wanted anything so much.
She clasped Angelika’s hand, and her friend squeezed back.
“Me, too,” Esme said. “Me, too.”
