41. A Long Night’s Watch
My family was eating dinner in the dining room when I got home, giving me the perfect opportunity to sneak upstairs and into my room without running into anybody. I just wanted to be alone.
I started to sob the moment my body hit my bed.
I cried for a long while, until I eventually fell asleep, only waking up sometime late in the night when I heard a gentle knock on my door.
My mom stepped into my room. “Dorothy?” she asked. “I didn’t hear you come home.”
I could barely make out her figure in the darkness. She was wearing her pajamas, so I supposed she must have just finished putting my siblings to bed and was preparing to go to sleep herself.
I was a bit disoriented, so it took me a moment to realize where I was and why my body felt like it had been hit by a truck.
To be honest, I was surprised I had been able to sleep at all, especially without Ace by my side. I guess I had just exhausted myself with all my crying.
When I remembered everything that had happened, all I wanted to do was bury myself in my covers and never come back out.
I checked my new phone, expecting to find hundreds of missed calls and texts from Ace. Nothing.
He hadn’t even attempted to come and sleep with me. It wasn’t as if I would have let him—I made sure my window was locked before falling asleep—but it still hurt to know that he didn’t try.
He was giving me space. Just like I asked him to.
So why did it feel like my heart was being ripped out of my chest?
“I didn’t want to talk to anybody when I got home. I had a really long day,” I croaked.
“Okay.” My mom paused. “Well, um, do you want to explain to me why Ace is standing outside our house, looking like a lost puppy?”
That got my attention. “What?” I quickly threw back my covers and ran to my window.
Just like my mom said, Ace was standing in front of our house. He was leaning on his car in the street, arms crossed over his chest, staring up at my window.
I knew the moment he noticed me peering down at him. His shoulders loosened, and he tilted his head to the side, acknowledging that I was looking at him.
I yanked my curtains shut, blocking my view of him.
“We had a fight.” I climbed back into my bed, hating the way my voice wobbled. I didn’t care if he was standing out there. It changed nothing. I didn’t want to talk to him.
“I don’t know what he’s doing out there though. He should just go home.”
My mom approached my bed with a concerned look on her face. “Do you want to talk about it?”
I shook my head. “Not really.” Not at all actually.
My mom nodded. She understood if I was giving Ace the cold shoulder, it was probably for a good reason.
I would tell her eventually. Just not tonight.
“Are you going to sleep in your jeans?”
I looked down. I had totally forgotten to change into my pajamas when I got home.
It took too much energy to get up and change though. “I think I just want to go to sleep.”
“Okay, honey. That sounds like a good idea.” Her eyes strayed to my window again.
“Should I tell Ace to go home?”
I thought about it. I could text him, but I was so not in the mood to deal with that right now. If anything, I was starting to crave him, wishing he was here to wrap his arms around me.
And the more we talked about him standing outside, the worse that craving became.
But it was the opposite of what I needed.
“I really don’t care what Ace does,” I finally responded. “If he wants to stand out there all night, then so be it.”
“I could send your dad out to talk to him,” Mom suggested.
I pulled my covers to my chin. “Ace is going to do whatever he wants no matter what anybody says to him. Trust me, I know.
“Dad should save his energy. Ace will go home eventually.”
Especially since it was supposed to get cold tonight. There was no way he would be stupid enough to stay out there all night.
At least, I hoped he wouldn’t be stupid enough to stay out there all night.
“Okay. Well, let me know if you need anything, sweetheart. Your father and I are just down the hall.” im—I made sure She leaned down and kissed my cheek. “I love you.”
“I love you too,” I murmured. “Goodnight.”
Giving me one final sympathetic look, my mom left the room.
I stared up at the ceiling once I was alone, trying to get my thoughts in order.
Do not go look at him again, Doe, I thought to myself. ~Be strong. Do ~not~ go look at him again.~ My inner monologue was useless. No matter how many times I repeated those words, the urge was too strong.
I just wanted to see if he was still there.
After slowly peeling back my blankets, I tiptoed over to my window. I grabbed the edge of my curtains and pulled it to the side so the tiniest sliver of my window was revealed.
Sure enough, Ace was standing in the same place, lit up by the streetlight above him. He was still staring up at my window too.
It felt like he was staring straight at me. But there was no way he could see me from all the way down n’t care if he was there through the tiniest sliver of my curtains. Right?
With my curiosity momentarily satisfied, I stepped back from my window and fell back into my bed
with a groan.
It was going to be a long night.
It took too much energy to get up and change though. “I think I just want to go to sleep.”
“Okay, honey. That sounds like a good idea.” Her eyes strayed to my window again.
“Should I tell Ace to go home?”
I thought about it. I could text him, but I was so not in the mood to deal with that right now. If anything, I was starting to crave him, wishing he was here to wrap his arms around me.
And the more we talked about him standing outside, the worse that craving became.
But it was the opposite of what I needed.
“I really don’t care what Ace does,” I finally responded. “If he wants to stand out there all night, then so be it.”
“I could send your dad out to talk to him,” Mom suggested.
I pulled my covers to my chin. “Ace is going to do whatever he wants no matter what anybody says to him. Trust me, I know.
“Dad should save his energy. Ace will go home eventually.”
Especially since it was supposed to get cold tonight. There was no way he would be stupid enough to stay out there all night.
At least, I hoped he wouldn’t be stupid enough to stay out there all night.
“Okay. Well, let me know if you need anything, sweetheart. Your father and I are just down the hall.”
She leaned down and kissed my cheek. “I love you.”
“I love you too,” I murmured. “Goodnight.”
Giving me one final sympathetic look, my mom left the room.
I stared up at the ceiling once I was alone, trying to get my thoughts in order.
Do not go look at him again, Doe, I thought to myself. ~Be strong. Do ~not~ go look at him again.~ My inner monologue was useless. No matter how many times I repeated those words, the urge was too strong.
I just wanted to see if he was still there.
After slowly peeling back my blankets, I tiptoed over to my window. I grabbed the edge of my curtains and pulled it to the side so the tiniest sliver of my window was revealed.
Sure enough, Ace was standing in the same place, lit up by the streetlight above him. He was still staring up at my window too.
It felt like he was staring straight at me. But there was no way he could see me from all the way down there through the tiniest sliver of my curtains. Right?
With my curiosity momentarily satisfied, I stepped back from my window and fell back into my bed
with a groan.
It was going to be a long night.
