[ 10 ]
Time to Level Collapse: 4 days, 3 hours.
I SLEPT MUCH LONGER THAN I PLANNED. THE ROOMS WERE SMALL, BUT NOT claustrophobic like the dungeon bathrooms or the racks in a Coast Guard cutter. The bed was more comfortable than I expected. The white cotton sheets smelled brand new and faintly like laundry detergent. And while the halls of the dungeon were humid and stuffy, the temperature in the rooms was a bit chilly, just how I liked it. Donut insisted upon sleeping in the room with me. As usual, she slept on my neck.
I didn’t dare take off my shirt or cloak, though I knew I was supposed to be safe. Once my head hit the pillow, I was out. I didn’t dream, wasn’t haunted by nightmares like most nights.
I awakened feeling refreshed and full of energy. I looked at the countdown time, astonished that I’d slept 10 hours straight. I hadn’t slept that long without waking in at least five years. It took the literal end of the world to finally give me a full night’s rest.
Donut yawned deeply and rolled onto her side as I sat up. “Go back to bed,” she said sleepily. “I need several more hours. That is an order from your princess.”
“Get up,” I said. “Tally is making you food, remember?”
That perked her up.
The bathrooms in the restaurant had stalls for showers with soap and shampoo dispensers. There was also cheap, disposable razors and shaving cream. I finally peeled my clothes off and took a long, warm shower. I stayed until the water no longer ran black. I shaved. There were no towels, however, and I had to drip dry.
My internal clock was already broken. I knew it was nighttime again on the planet’s surface, but when I saw the plate with bacon, eggs, and pancakes, I sat down and inhaled it all. It felt like breakfast time. It felt like a new day.
I wondered about those who’d survived but didn’t go into the tunnels.
How were they faring? Especially folks in the area of the winter storm. With no shelter, they’d have to build one from scratch. With no electricity, they’d have to make fires. And how much available food would there be? Probably not much. Even most of the animals like chickens and pigs were probably in coops and barns during the collapse.
Across from me, Donut was eating her third plate of salmon pâté.
I’d been deliberately avoiding looking up at the board, but I did now.
4,148,111. How soon before my number would be ticked away?
I tried asking Tally some general questions about the dungeon, but he refused to answer. He’d only answer questions directly relating to the Safe Rooms.
“If I buy a personal space, will it transfer from level to level?”
“Yes, it will,” he said. “And from safe space to safe space. Also, it’s best to buy all the accessories as soon as you can. Some of the items only upgrade when it goes down a level, so if you wait several levels before you purchase a crafting table, it won’t get as strong as one purchased earlier.”
Soon thereafter, we left to hunt for some bugs.
Outside, the hall was just the same as before. I looked warily about for red dots, but I didn’t see any of the bugs. I stepped a bit from the entrance, and I pulled out a cigarette and lit it, sighing deeply. I counted, and I had nine left after this one.
“Really, Carl. Must you light that? You know how I feel about them.”
“Jesus, Donut,” I said. “You’re worse than Bea.”
“While Miss Beatrice and I don’t always see eye-to-eye on certain policy decisions of the household, I must agree with her on this one. Cigarettes are disgusting.”
“Well, there are only nine left, so you won’t have to suffer…”
I stopped dead as the trio of Scatterers rounded the corner, chittering as
they approached. It was two level twos and a level four that was larger than the others. This third bug was almost the size of Donut. I wouldn’t be
squishing this one with my foot.
Scatterer Brood Guardian. Level 4.
Cockroaches that have been baptized in rage and Monster Energy drinks.
Like its smaller brethren, the Scatterer Brood Guardian is a giant bug who wants nothing more than to fuck you up. Unlike his little
brother, these guys are dangerous.
Shit. That doesn’t sound good.
I really didn’t want to fight this thing with my hands. Despite knowing I did less damage this way, I pulled out my toad cudgel and clasped it in my hand while Donut blasted the large cockroach three times with a magic missile. It hissed and rolled back a few times, its health knocked down by half.
“Want me to hit it again?” Donut asked. “I'll have to down a mana potion.”
“No,” I said, relieved that the missiles did so much damage. “I’ll take it.”
I stomped forward with my foot, crushing both the smaller roaches.
The brood guardian jumped back up and charged again. It was fast, but I was ready for it. It skittered forward, mandible-antennae things thrashing. I swung the cudgel down at its head. The rounded edge of my weapon bounced off the creature, which hissed and fell back.
The hit didn’t appear to do much damage. Plus I had to awkwardly bend down to use it. I quickly switched to my poker to see if that’d be better. It charged again, and I stabbed with the iron stick. Its giant head knocked the poker right out of my hand, and it went flying.
This place has the shittiest weapons.
I stepped back and snap kicked, hitting the roach right under its little, semicircle head. It squealed. The kick did more damage than the magic missile. I swept forward, continuing to kick at it while it shrank back. Donut leaped off my shoulder with a hiss as I jumped in the air, coming down hard on its back.
The cockroach exploded like a balloon filled with coconut pudding.
“Goddamnit,” I said, looking at the goo on my feet.
Donut crept forward and sniffed the remains. It didn’t leave anything lootable.
“The level 4 ones aren’t too hard to kill,” Donut said. “Oh, he just smells awful.”
I looked at the map. A couple curves of the halls led to the large room. It looked as if there was a door, too.
“Okay, this is what we’re going to do,” I said as I went to retrieve my poker. The damn thing was useless, and I shoved it in my inventory. “We’ll wait until your mana refills, then we’re going to creep toward that main room and peek inside. If it’s too much to handle, we’ll run back here and rush into the safe room.”
“The safe room door won’t open if mobs are outside,” Donut said.
“We’ll be fast.”
“That’s fine,” she said after a moment. “Just remember I can run a lot faster than you.”
We ended up killing a couple dozen more of the level 4 Scatterers before we reached the door. We found a hit to the face with a magic missile just before it lunged would stun it. I’d punch down a few times and then stomp the head. Stomping the head almost always resulted in a critical hit. We received several vials of something called Scatterer Hemolymph, which looked like the white goo that came out of them when they died. The system identified it as an alchemy material.
Every once in a while, the Scatterer would get inflicted with Sepsis when it was hit by the magic missile. When that happened, it would turn and try to run off. It would usually collapse and die after it took about thirty steps.
Both Donut and I were level 5 when we got to the door.
For me, the higher levels didn’t really mean anything. I received three stat points every time I leveled, but I couldn’t distribute them yet. The only thing that helped was that my Pugilism, Unarmed Combat, Foot Soldier, and Smush skills were all level 5 now also.
Because of Donut’s special buff, she was growing with each level up. Her strength was at 15. Now when she jumped onto me, I could feel the strength of her claws on my shoulder, even through the leather jacket and trollskin shirt.
“Do you have any sort of slashing skill?” I asked. “You know, something with your claws?”
“Of course I do,” Donut said. “My Slice Attack is at level four, and my Back Claw is also level four.”
“Okay, good,” I said. “You can help if we get into trouble. Your strength
is way higher than mine. You should get in there once your magic runs out.”
The door at the end of the tunnel didn’t have any sort of official sign on my minimap. We crept toward it, going as silently as possible. Donut’s little bell jingled with each step. The room beyond was large and round shaped, probably about 1,500 square feet. The door itself was old and grimy with a doorknob that appeared to be hanging on by a single bolt. While it wasn’t labeled on the minimap, there was a paper sign attached to the door written in Spanish. It looked like some sort of official notice. The sign was old and weathered, and it looked like it had been there awhile.
“No entrar,” I whispered, squinting at the sign. “I think that means do not enter. The next part ‘por orden del Centro de Salud,’ I don’t know. By order of something, I think. Can you read it?”
Donut just looked at me like it was the stupidest question she’d ever been asked.
“It doesn’t matter,” I whispered. “Okay. We’re cracking the door and looking inside.”
The doorknob didn’t work, and the door wasn’t fully latched. I pushed it open as slowly as I could. The door screeched, and I cringed.
The room was pitch black. I couldn’t see a damn thing. I heard rustling, so I knew there was something in there, but I couldn’t see what it was.
Donut was standing completely still, her hair poofed out like when she
was freaked out.
“What do you see?” I asked.
“There’s a lot of level one and two cockroaches in there. Lots and lots of them. But there’s other stuff in there, and I can’t tell what it is. It looks like piles of garbage. It smells like that bag you take with you on those days that other guy comes over to the apartment. You know, like socks. But hundreds of them. I don’t see anything else. Light a torch and throw it in there.”
“Wait, what?” I said. “Are you talking about my gym bag? Some guy was coming over to the apartment when I was at the gym?”
“Focus, Carl. Light a torch.”
“Actually,” I said, “I have a better idea.”
I couldn’t believe it. Actually, I could believe it. It was my own fault. I should have broken up with her long ago. I felt like an idiot. I also suddenly felt very reckless.
“Get ready to run,” I said as I pulled out the stick of goblin dynamite. The red stick was wet and sticky on the outside, like it was sweating. I examined
its properties.
The game show voice whispered the description: Goblin Dynamite.
This stuff is especially volatile. It’s so volatile, you probably don’t even need to light the wick to set it off. It’s so volatile, even loud noises might set it off. Keep it in your inventory until you’re ready to use it. Be gentle and don’t squeeze too hard or else you might get the… The AI didn’t speak for a good two seconds.
BOOM!
The AI shouted that last word in my head, and I almost pissed myself. I stood still for several moments, my heart thrashing.
“You are a fucking asshole,” I whispered up at the air.
“Okay,” I whispered to Donut. “Run now. I’m right behind you.”
Donut scampered away as I carefully pulled my Zippo. I lit the long wick, which started hissing and popping like a sparkler. I tossed the dynamite into the room, throwing it as hard as I could. I turned, and I ran.
I prayed it wouldn’t blow when it hit the ground.
