43
I’M NOT IMMATURE, I’M
GOOFY; THERE’S A
DIFFERENCE
Carter
“I GOT ONE!”
“What? Lemme see.” I try to grab Olivia’s shing rod, but she twists away.
“Back o!” She kicks her leg out, splashing water at me. “You’re gonna let it get away!”
“No I’m not!” I reach for the rod again, but she dashes down the stream, reeling in her line as she goes. “I know how to reel in a sh, Olivia!”
“I’d believe you if I’d seen you do it, Carter!” She’s got her tongue out, poking the corner of her mouth as she works, grunting, reeling, and when that salmon breaks the water, she a-ha’s, an arrogant beam spreading across her face.
“What’s that now? Four for me, zero for you?”
“Shut up.” I slosh water up at her, and she giggles. It’s kinda maniacal and a little scary. “It’s ’cause I let you use my good rod.”
“It’s ’cause I’m better.” She winks. “At using this rod and the one in your pants.”
“Ollie,” I muse, half gasp, half guaw. “I’ve never been so attracted to you as I am right now.”
“You’re always attracted to me,” she murmurs, focused on prying the hook from her salmon.
This is true. Always. Always, always, always. Though there’s denitely something about standing in a stream, water up to her knees, her teensy denim shorts soaked from all the splashing, holding a sh that’s, like, a third of her height in length that makes her especially sexy right now.
Olivia grunts, lugging the big sh up, slinging it across her arms. “Can you take a picture? So you can always remember that I don’t just kick your ass at beer pong, but at salmon shing too.”
The rumble of protest in my throat quickly dies as I snap her picture over and over, and when Olivia sets the sh free, I wade over to a large rock and take a seat.
She sinks down beside me, sticking her head over my shoulder. “Did you just add that to your secret spank bank folder?”
I tuck my phone into my pocket. “Yeah.”
“It’s a little… different than the normal pictures you put in there.”
“You look hot as fuck. Your legs are all wet and your smile is as cocky as mine.” I graze the tip of her nose with mine. “I mean, if you wanna take o your clothes and let me fuck your throat right now, I can take a picture and add that one, too, pip-squeak. We don’t have any outdoor pictures.”
“That’s not true. I took a picture of you between my thighs on your balcony last week.”
“Oh yeah. Fuck. I ate like a king that day.” I nudge her shoulder with mine.
“And stop calling it mine. It’s yours too. Not just the balcony, the whole damn
house.”
“Not yet, not ocially.”
I roll my eyes. “It’s been yours since you rst stepped into it.”
Her cheeks tint pink. It’s adorable she still blushes sometimes.
“You belong there, Ollie girl, and you always have. It’s yours, whether or not you’re waiting to ocially be out of your house and never ever sleep anywhere
but our bed again.”
“Never ever?”
I brush a kiss across her lips. “Never ever ever.”
For the rst time, Olivia stayed at my house last weekend while I wasn’t there.
She was all nervous about it, but there’s something about knowing she’s
puttering around my kitchen, lounging on my couches, sleeping in my bed while I’m away.
It’s been a month since she agreed to move in, and we nally listed her house last week. It sold in thirty-six hours for 25 percent over asking because Vancouver real estate is on re right now. It doesn’t close until end of June, which means I’ve got another six-ish weeks to go of Olivia pretending like she’s only “sleeping over.”
I can’t wait to build our home together.
“You know,” I say, leaning into her. “Cara and Em’s wedding is that
weekend.”
“Mhmm.”
“So we’ll be too busy to move. And you’ll be too busy hiding from Cara for
at least two weeks before that.”
“This is true.”
“So maybe you should move in now.”
“Hmm…” Olivia’s lips purse, and she rubs her chin like she needs to think long and hard about it.
Ha. Long and hard. That’s what she—no. No, Carter. Be more mature.
“Well, I don’t know. I’m about to spend all summer with you, you know.
Feels like I should soak up all this personal space before you invade it.”
A growl rumbles in my chest.
“Hmm…” She raises her palm in a half shrug. “Plus, you only have seven replaces, and I was kinda hoping for an e—” Her words dissolve on my tongue as my mouth takes hers, and I lift her, setting her on my lap, hugging her to me.
“Stay, please.”
Olivia takes my face in her hands, warm brown eyes sparkling in the sun. “I don’t want to rush the move itself. You’re in the middle of play-os. I want you to focus on that, not getting me moved out of my house. And it’s the end of the school year. I’ve got exams and wrap-up to work on for these kids.” She kisses the corner of my mouth, right where it’s tugging down. “But I’ll stay, Carter. We can worry about moving things later, or a little bit at a time, when time permits.
Okay?”
“Compromise?”
“Compromise.”
“And I get to keep you forever? Can it start tonight?”
“Do I have a choice?”
“No.” I grip her waist, leap to my feet, and spin her in the air. “Woo-hoo!”
Olivia giggles, slinging her arms around my neck. “Are you ready to eat?”
My stomach takes its cue, growling. “Always.”
I carry her out of the water, where she takes a seat on the blanket we laid out earlier, right on the edge of the shore, and I start to get the re ready in the pit.
“You know,” Olivia starts, “I grew up on a lake, but I’ve never had a shore lunch before.”
“Really? My dad and I had them all the time.” It’s why we’re here after all.
My dad’s birthday is this week, and he used to take the entire week o work.
He’d pull me from school for two days, then my sister, followed by whisking my mom away for a long weekend. We’d nish on Sunday night, all of us, together at his favorite restaurant. He spent his birthday doing the things he loved most with the people he loved most. For him and me, after hockey, it was this. Hiking, shing, lunches on the shore. I mentioned it to Olivia a week ago, how it was one of my favorite cluster of days each year, how I haven’t done it since he passed, and the next morning she called me to tell me she’d taken a couple days o.
I fucking love her so much it hurts.
“I know it’s not the same, Carter, but are you…” She trails o, ddling with the edge of the blanket. She clears her throat. “Are you having fun?”
My heart tugs in my chest. “I’m having so much fun here with you today, Ollie. It makes me feel like he’s right here with us.”
Olivia smiles. “I think he is. Always.”
“I think so too.”
I get to work on lunch, lleting the salmon Olivia caught earlier this morning. She wanted to pack sandwiches in case we didn’t catch anything, but I didn’t let her. I was too condent. Turns out she should’ve been the condent one.
I place the foil packets over the coals and step back, taking a look around. The small campsite is exactly how I remember it, hidden within all the greenery, plush brush and old, towering trees. Sunshine lters through the branches,
making the stream sparkle, and birds sing on a continuous loop. It’s as pristine as it always was, aside from the odd camping gear left scattered and forgotten on the ground, like the re extinguisher lying ten feet or so from the pit.
I pick up the narrow, white canister. The label tells me it’s one that sprays water, and the gauge says it’s still got some life left in it.
“Hey, Ollie, look.” I hold the canister between my legs and aim the hose outward. When she meets my gaze, I squeeze the handle, a stream of water spraying out in a ne mist as I swivel my hips. “It looks like I’m jiz—”
“Yes, Carter, I know what it looks like.”
I lean against the trunk of a tree, icking my brows up. “You wanna go back in the bushes? I can empty my load in your—”
“For fuck’s sake, Carter. I know your dad didn’t teach you this on one of your many shing expeditions.”
“No, he didn’t.” I chuckle, taking a seat beside her on the blanket as years of memories come ooding back, memories I’ve spent years wanting to forget. I don’t have a clue why, not when they’re as incredible as these.
I wind an arm around Olivia, and she settles into my side. She’s warm beneath the May sun, and she smells like coconut and lime, the sunscreen she made us both wear.
“He taught me how to set up my rod, how to knot my hooks and bait them.
He taught me how to skate, how to puck-handle, how to take a slap shot. He taught me how to turn my shoelaces into bunny ears and tie them, how to make my mom’s favorite dinner to get her to stop being mad at me when I messed up, how to work hard and save money. He taught me how to be a good son, a
brother, and a friend.”
“And a partner,” Olivia adds.
“He taught me how to love. I know how to love you so well because I watched him love my mom so well, love me and my sister so unconditionally.
Does that make me a good partner? How much I love you?”
“Mhmm. But there are so many reasons you’re a good partner, Carter. You’re erce and loyal. You’re patient and kind and the most passionate person I know.
You never give up, and you’re so proud of me all the time, and it helps me be
proud of myself. I’m a more condent person than I was six months ago because of the love you show me.”
“I like that.” A heaviness settles on my chest, a weight that’s been looming for years, waiting for a vulnerability to jump on. Olivia’s my vulnerability. As strong as I am, loving her makes me weak too. Our love opens up pieces of me I didn’t know existed, or maybe pieces I’d tucked away. Because I’d do anything for her, give her anything, and right now, I want to give her the truth I’ve been avoiding.
“I’m not sure I’ve been the best son, though. Not to my dad.”
“What do you mean?”
“I haven’t visited him since the funeral, the cemetery where he’s buried.”
Olivia runs her ngers through my hair. “I don’t think that makes you a bad son, Carter. Things like that can be challenging. Maybe that’s not where you feel him. And that’s okay. Do you want to go back?”
“It’s always felt too hard, but maybe… maybe one day, if you’ll come with me.
Things always feel easier with you.”
Her smile is soft and warm, like her. “Hard things are always easier when we’re together.”
She’s right. And that’s exactly how I nd myself turning right where I should be turning left two hours later.
That’s how I nd myself gripping the steering wheel as I stare down the long path that winds through the cemetery, the simple thought of walking through it daunting.
Think that’s how I nd myself clutching Olivia’s hand as she walks alongside me, and still as she stands next to me while I stare down at the words carved in marble before us.
Theodore ‘Theo’ Beckett
LOVING HUSBAND & DEVOTED FATHER BEST FRIEND “Remember me as I lived: full of love, laughter, and passion”
There’s a strange ache in my chest. It’s tight and a little painful, but it’s not heavy. And when Olivia squeezes my hand, when she turns into my side and
presses a kiss to my arm, the pain starts to retreat.
I don’t know how long we stand there in silence, but when I’m ready to leave, Olivia presses a kiss to my lips.
“Just a second, Carter. There’s something I want to do rst.”
She approaches my dad’s grave, and when she kneels in front of it, head bowing, my throat constricts. Her head lifts after a moment, and she lays her hand over his name before she stands and makes her way back to me. I don’t know what to say, but she doesn’t ask me to talk, so we ride in silence, her hand in mine in the center console.
“Carter,” Olivia says as we drive through downtown. “I hate to do this, but would you mind stopping? I need to use the bathroom and I’m not sure I can wait.”
“Sure, baby. Where do you want me to stop?”
She points at the building up the street. “Just at your condo.”
“We can’t go there.”
“I’ll be quick.”
“I sold the condo, Ollie.”
“What? When?”
“Uh, you know the rst time I came to see you at work? The Monday after I brought you to the condo? I dropped the keys o to my real estate agent that morning and asked her to take care of it. It was gone by the end of the week.”
It was a bonus years ago when I re-signed with Vancouver after my initial contract was up. I had no intention of going anywhere else, but everybody who could aord me wanted me, and Vancouver wanted to make sure I stayed, so they threw everything they could at me. I only lived there for one season before I bought my house, and instead of selling it, I kept it. I wanted that part of my life separate from the rest of it, the most personal parts of me. I wasn’t lying when I said Olivia was the rst woman I’d had in my bed at home, and she’ll be the only.
“Carter…”
“It was never my home, Ollie. Not without you.”
My home is wherever Olivia is. When we’re lying on the balcony an hour later, freshly showered and wasting away the rest of the afternoon, the warm
breeze tickling our skin, this is where I feel it the most, where I could stay forever, so long as it’s with her.
My ngers dance across Olivia’s shoulders, kissed pink and sprinkled with tiny freckles from the sun. “You’re so beautiful, Ollie.”
“You just like my sundresses.”
“I fucking love your sundresses.” Winter lasted for-fucking-ever here, a colossal shitstorm Vancouver hasn’t seen in ages and hopefully never sees again, but spring came roaring in like a lion. April was warm and rainy, and May’s been every bit an early summer. That means Olivia’s traded in her sweaters for these adorable sundresses that show o her legs, her shoulders, and I get to be touching her all the time, feeling how warm her skin is beneath my lips, or my cheek on her shoulder. “We should relocate to San Jose or Tampa, somewhere it’s always warm. You’ll never have to wear pants again.”
“Mmm… and you know what comes with no pants, Carter?”
“What?”
She crawls on top of me, straddling my hips, her yellow sundress riding up.
She guides my hand up her creamy thigh, and I think I might cry when I meet
that pool of heat.
Her lips meet my jaw. “No panties.”
No fucking panties.
She tugs on my shorts, shifting them down, and I hiss when her hand wraps around my cock. I fumble for my phone, snapping a picture as she swallows me in her mouth.
I gather her damp curls in my st. “I fucking love you.”
Fuck, you ever seen the most beautiful girl in the world smile at you with her mouth full of your cock? Jesus Christ, it’s a sight. I take one more picture before I yank her head back.
“I need you to sit on me, baby. Right fucking now.”
She presses herself against me, rocking, letting my cock slide through her sopping slit, and before she can take me, I stop her.
“Wait. I just want to say… thank you. Thank you for today, Ollie. Spending the day doing something my dad and I used to do together, going with me to see him… it means a lot to me. Thank you.”
Her smile is tender and a little bit bashful, and she sits back on my thighs. “I was thinking maybe next year we could do a whole week for your dad’s birthday, the way he always did, with you and your sister and your mom. Do the things you guys did together. And Hank as well. We could do something he and Ireland loved to do. Maybe it would be a nice way to remember them.”
I don’t know how I found her, but I’m pretty sure it was fate, the same way I walked into the bar Hank was in that night.
“Can I ask you something, Ollie? What did you say? To my dad? When you
knelt down…”
“Thank you.”
“Thank you?”
“I thanked him for bringing me another family, trusting me with loving them. I thanked him for raising the man I love, and for bringing him to me.”
Her hand glides along my jaw. “I thanked him for you, Carter.”
My chest constricts, my throat squeezing. I look to the sky, and a single tear drips down my cheek. Olivia’s lips trap it, stopping it in its track, and when she whispers how much she loves me, I bury myself to the hilt in the best thing that’s ever been mine.
“YOU’RE GOING TO BURN MY steak if you don’t stop looking at me.”
I grin at Olivia, hitting her with a wink. She’s lounging on a blanket on the grass, feet in the air as she reads a book, curls piled on top of her head. I don’t know how anybody can be expected to take their eyes o her, but she’s picky about her steak and I like to please her, so I manage.
Today’s been perfect, a glimpse at the summer to come, days on end to spend together, and I don’t want it to end. It’s been a welcome reprieve from the constant need to be on, always thinking about the next play-o game. Breaks are few and far between, but we’re one game away from taking Winnipeg in the conference nals tomorrow night, and I managed to surprise Olivia by ying her parents out for the game we played there two nights ago. It’s been a hectic month, and with the nals looming and Olivia’s move, June is shaping up to be even more chaotic.
“Is that your phone?” Olivia calls, head cranking in the direction of the patio door.
My ears perk, and when I hear my ringtone, I shut the lid on the barbecue and jog to the door. My phone sits on the kitchen countertop, and the number is one I don’t recognize.
“Am I speaking with Carter?” the voice on the other end asks.
“This is Carter.”
“Hi, Carter. My name is Dr. Murphy. I’m a doctor at Vancouver General Hospital. You’re listed as Hank De Vries’s emergency contact.”
The barbecue tongs in my hands clatter to the oor, and I barely register
Olivia’s voice calling out to me.
“There’s been an accident.”
